My name is April, and I am addicted to Facebook.

Facebook is holding me back. I’ll tell you what I mean.

Tonight I really wanted to go to bed early. My new “good habit” for this month, via coachcox.com is getting 8 hours of sleep per night.

Stop shaking your head and chuckling.

I can do it.

Can YOU? That’s right. I’m literally taking a SLEEP challenge. I’ve never been so happy to accept a challenge. 🙂

Coach Cox doesn’t really call it a sleep challenge. He calls it building healthy habits. I think sleep challenge sounds more fun. 😉 The Water Challenge worked out really nicely for me, so I have high hopes.

I WAS going to go to bed at 10, but first, I HAD to clean the house up. I have no visions of grandeur when it comes to cleaning house. I set a timer for 60 minutes and clean. Once my timer goes off, it’s “Sorry, house.”

I just spent 30 minutes on my hands and knees scrubbing food stains out of my dining room carpet. We do not have an eat-in kitchen. We only have a dining room. Who puts wall-to-wall carpet in the eating area?

My timer went off, so then I HAD to check Facebook. What if one of my friends has something important to say about Caitlyn Jenner, how much they love their sister, Lynard Skynard, or modest clothing, and I MISS IT??? 😉

No, I’m kidding, but if you know me at all, then you know I check Facebook everyday. Actually, that’s not true. You only know that if YOU also check Facebook everyday.

We should have a support group.

Hi. My name is April, and I check Facebook more than once a day.

There I said it. I mostly go on there to see if there’s anything new that pertains to me. Do I have any new messages? Did anyone read my blog? Does anyone ever read my blog?

At one point, the book of Faces introduced “top friends”. This is where you star your top friends, and then it tells you every blessed time they post something new. This is a bad idea. Now when I go on Facebook, I see the blue world lit up with the number 3 or something on it, and I think, “Ooo! I have something new!” Then I click the world, and lo and behold, it’s just telling me that one of the random friends that I starred, that one day that I starred a few people, uploaded a new photo via Instagram.

Anyway. Once I check my blue world, I instantly get sucked in by my news feed. It’s like the newspaper, or t.v., only these are people I actually know!!! Yes, for some reason, I DO want to look at 10 pictures of your new puppy. And YES! I DO need to read this new and sensational article from Matt Walsh.

I’m not being sarcastic. I DO.

What’s funny is that even with all the time I spend on Facebook, the FB powers that be still do not understand me!!  Not. at. all. You know those ads in the sidebar? They keep trying to sell me sewing machines.

If something rips in our house, it means either we never get to wear it again, or Alan has to sew it up. Actually, my sewing machine and kit are currently living at Alan’s school’s engineering building, where he has been using it for design projects, believe it or not.

Facebook, just because I’m a home schooling mom of four does not mean I love sewing. We don’t wear bibs on our clothing or run around barefoot either. Oh, wait, yes we do do that last one.

Also, Facebook doesn’t even show my latest blog posts to ALAN in HIS news feed. I get it. They have their algorithms or whatever, but Alan reads everything I post. You’d think I would at least make it into my husband’s news feed.

You should star me, Alan. We can be “top friends.”

Did you know that if you have a Facebook business/blog/community/whatever page, they give you insights about your audience, as they continue to try to convince you to BUY news feed space? Facebook, I refuse to pay you to be in anyone’s news feed. Stop asking. If only 100 people see my story, then it must not have been relevant to more than 100  people. Let’s just leave it at that.

According to Facebook pages, my blog is most popular in Alabama, Virginia, and California. No surprise there.

So there you have it. This is my Facebook junkie confession. For some reason, it does not feel like a badge of honor…hmmm  Maybe this summer I will have so much fun that I will only check the ‘book once/day…

Don’t worry. I’m not going anywhere. I’m not leaving the party.

1.) I have a need to see your kids’ “last day of school” photos and newborn babies. I can’t help it. I NEED to see them.

2.) Facebook is my #1 source for blog viewers, so thank you, FB friends!

3.) Facebook is like television for me. It kills ridiculous amounts of time, and leaves me typically feeling discouraged by the news and confused about status updates that leave you hanging.

4.) It helps me keep up with friends and family.

5.) Stuff like this–hilarious!

IHappy Hump Day! I’ll be packing soon. We are Bama Bound!! All of my summer clothes are in under-bed bags, so I’d better start digging! I hear it’s hot there.

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