I Will Not Panic Today, Even if Dirt Boy Dumps Dirt on the Dining Room Floor
Tonight I’m hosting my home school moms’ group.
That means that I will be spending all day trying to clean up my house, take care of four children, and cook.
I need to make sure that I don’t fall into the prideful trap of cleaning up my house to try to make myself look good.
It’s not about me.
Let’s not put on a show and act like my house is always this neat, if I even manage to get it neat.
It’s about my guests. They need to feel at ease and cozy. The house should smell good. The surfaces should all be cleaned off, with plenty of places to sit. The bathroom should feel squeaky clean, as though no four-year-old boy has ever peed there before.
….But not so I can pretend like I’m the Queen of Clean.
Who are we kidding here?
Instead I need to focus on this:
I just want to create an inviting atmosphere for women who are getting a night off. Everyone needs a night off. Parents do not get nights off. Those are hard to find. I just want a room full of laughing women, encouraging each other through this life-changing thing that we call parenting.
I always leave moms’ nights feeling inspired and uplifted. That’s what I’m hoping for tonight.
I hope the food is yummy too.
So with that in mind, I will not panic if my hostess day does not go as planned.
-Not even if Daniel tears down the towel rack because he thought that he could swing from it like a monkey.
-Not even if John David proudly carries a Tonka dump truck full of dirt and dumps it onto my carpeted dining room floor.
-Not even if I run out of toilet bowl cleaner. Shampoo works for that too, and it smells better.
-Not even if I have to change recipes because of a cooking mistake.
-Not even if I burn the bread.
-Not even if my vacuum cleaner quits.
-Not even if someone breaks their arm. (Please, boys, do not break your arms today.)
I will not panic. I will not. I will not go into my room and scream into my pillow because if my motives are in the RIGHT place, I will remember that these sort of problems are just hiccups and stories.
I’m reading this incredible book, by Lysa Terkeurst. In fact, if you click on this link to buy the book for yourself, I make a whopping 4 cents a copy. (Haaaaa! Not even kidding.)
She pointed this “not about me thing” out to me, in chapter 7 of her book. I came “Unglued” this week in the exact way she described in chapter 7 because of my wrong motives. I so badly wanted Alan’s parents to think that I was a good parent and a decent housekeeper that I way overdid it on my first born, over a pair of basketball shorts, of all things. I put so much pressure on myself, that I get all worked up over the dumbest things.
Also, I should pause here and THANK my in-laws for 1.) raising Alan, 2.) helping clean my house so I can blog on hostess day, and 3.) catching up on laundry. Let’s face it. When you have four kids, life is really just laundry anyway. Endless amounts of laundry…..Oh! And 4.) Being so wonderful. Thank you!
So back to this week’s meltdowns…..
The details aren’t necessary. Just know that sometimes I lose it, and maybe sometimes you lose it too. Or maybe you don’t. Maybe you’re more of a stuffer, and you stuff your problems or shut people out.
I usually end up doing both exploding and stuffing, but either way, this book, Unglued, has been balm to my spirit this week. I know I often recommend books, but let me assure you that this is one you won’t regret. It’s infinitely better than the Susanna Wesley one I recommended. I’d offer to let you borrow mine, but it takes me forever to finish a book….
Here are a few of my favorite quotes from the book:
“Mostly I’m a good person with good motives, but not always. Not when I want life to be a little more about me or about making sure I look good. That’s when my motives become corrupted. The Bible is pretty blunt in naming the real issue here: evil desires…….Selfishness, Pride, Impatience, Anger, and Bitterness.” –p. 102-103, chapter 7
“That’s what makes raw emotions so complicated. They come from out of nowhere and run us slap over. Which is why it’s so important to prepare in advance for what will surely happen…” —p. 60, chapter 5
I feel like I’m learning to check my motives and get a plan in place.
I need to get back to work. Daniel just dug a giant hole, while looking for worms, in my front yard flower bed. The boys also need to be rounded back up and put back to work. That is one great thing about having all these boys. I have four built-in workers! Sure, they sometimes clean the mirrors with carpet cleaner or mop before they sweep, but they are my team, and I am proud of them.
1Oh give thanks to the LORD, for He is good, For His lovingkindness is everlasting. 2Let the redeemed of the LORD say so, Whom He has redeemed from the hand of the adversary… Psalm 107:1-2
I hope you all have a great weekend, full of fun, with no melt down moments whatsoever. 🙂 I hope to! Every day is new, with no mistakes in it.