parenting

Why it is So Important to Focus on the Big Picture Rather than Our Daily Difficulties

Oh, Daniel, you ARE Buzz Lightyear.

Today the boys and I had to walk all the way to the mini-mart, which is all of 1/2 a mile.

I put JD in the double jogger, that way I could put the milk I needed in the empty seat. How did we let ourselves run completely out of milk? Families of six cannot do such a thing!

I didn’t let anyone ride bikes, so Caleb ran most of it. One of Daniel’s biggest wishes is to beat Caleb in a race. Sometimes we try to rig races for him, by giving him a drastic head start, but it’s tough.

Daniel is a slightly short, far wiser than his years, four-year-old. This boy is an athletic, determined, do-it-myself, brownie cooking, tricycle-riding, Bible verse quoting, mouthy little POWERHOUSE. He is the mitochondria of California. I do not exaggerate.

(Excuse the science joke. It was cell week.)

But Daniel doesn’t see himself that way. He has no idea.

As he runs down that side-walk, boldly telling himself that he WILL catch up with Caleb, only to be passed by Joshua from way far behind, he just crumbles.

He whines. He cries, “Mom! He passed me.”

The pure competitiveness and ambition of it all! How I adore him, and no matter how many times (per day) that this scene must repeat itself, he tries again.

We can see the very circumstances that frustrate him gradually molding him into this strong, determined, and resilient person.

But Daniel didn’t see it that way.

He just wanted to WIN. He just wanted to SHOW ‘EM!

I just smiled, and I reassured him that he is extremely fast, ever so much faster than a normal four-year-old. And it’s not that he’s little. It’s just that he’s YOUNG, and one day he WILL beat them sometimes.

Daniel smiled, “Really?” Off he went like a rocket, only to crumble a few minutes later because “Caleb took a short-cut, and now I’ll never catch up.”

Then his shoe fell off–one house down from finally arriving safely back to our driveway. Sigh.

Life is exciting but hard.

I convinced him to climb into the double stroller because we were so close to home. The seat was still empty because the mini-mart, much to my dismay, was completely out of every single kind of milk.

I don’t know how to fully express to Daniel how incredible he is, and yet he will always measure himself against his older brothers, a ludicrous measurement, considering the current difference in their ages. That difference won’t count for much at all in fifteen years, so hang in there, Daniel!

Another great athletic achievement for Daniel. He started at the top of the slide-less slide and walked his way down ever so carefully.

This made me think of God and people.

We look all around. We strive and we fret and we whine just like Daniel. We want to know why we can’t be as fast as this guy or as successful as this other lady, but God doesn’t see it that way. We get discouraged because we can’t do things as well as we’d like to do, but God doesn’t see it that way.

He sees the big picture, just as I can see more of Daniel’s big picture than Daniel can.

Having these big brothers to compete with is TRULY making Daniel greater. He pushes himself harder than he would otherwise. He sticks up for himself fiercely. He overcomes short-comings QUICKLY so that he can keep up with those boys.

Daniel is becoming a driven, confident, self-assured man. It doesn’t matter if he never catches up with his brothers in stature. He is building an incredible character, and I get to watch it happen.

It happens to us, too. We just have to take our eyes off what we can’t do, and fix our eyes on God. With God, we can do ANYTHING. We will grow not in size (hopefully), but in character, just like Daniel. We can hone the talents that God has put in each of us into something beautiful. We can over come our short-comings to produce a more fruitful life, a life that benefits more than just ourselves.

For just a moment today, I gloried in the thought of focusing on the BIG picture, not just the trees in front of me.

We need to look at ourselves the way that we look at our children.

Still growing! We might even grow the most from the very circumstances that make us cry!

Me, at the “Ninja Warrior Playground”

For example, I have no idea how to delegate, and there are only 24 hours in each day, so I can’t have a blog that makes money anymore……

No, let’s replace that idea with this one:

This year I’ve decided to spend more time on teaching, learning to be a better teacher, healing my back, and getting out, both with and without my boys. So now is not the time to do sponsored posts or make any money at all. But I am well provided for, so that’s okay. I will work back to that another day, just not today.

“You’ll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You’ll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life’s
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never foget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU’LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!”

–Oh, the Places You’ll Go by Dr. Seuss

Can you do monkey bars with one broken wrist, like Joshua? Go, Joshua, go!

I hope you all have a great weekend. I hope one day you and Daniel both get to win. We all just need to endure the training first.

aprilmomoffour

April is an upbeat, Christian, blog-obsessed, military wife, and home schooling mom of four little boys. She writes about education, travel, and humorous adventures in parenting. Follow along if you’d like a little bit of encouragement and a whole lot of crazy.

View Comments

  • I absolutely love your posts! Thank you for this today! So neat that Daniel has so much grit and perseverance. But I am like Daniel though in that I have a hard time seeing the big picture. Sometimes it seems like I'm too focused on the negative and things I failed at rather than being more focused on the things I should be thankful for. Self-examination is helpful when we use it as a tool rather than a place to dwell. So loved what you said about fixing our eyes on God. You're amazing. Thanks for speaking to my heart. I'm gonna fix my eyes on God today rather than dwelling on my faults :)

    • Oh, that's wonderful. And thank you. I typically spend way too much time beating myself up over failures too. I'm trying to fix my eyes more on the Lord. It's not about me anyway, right?

  • Oh, I can so relate to seeing the children compare themselves. It can be heartbreaking sometimes. But you're right, in the big picture, it is wonderfully character-developing. God knows what he's about when he sets us in families, doesn't he?

  • I LOVED what you said in the very last paragraph. I believe that we forget that we do have to endure the training. Unfortunately, most of us(myself included) like to have instant gratification. Very well said, April!

    • Thank you, Laurelle! No one wants to endure the training. I sure don't. :)

  • I really loved the mitochondria joke! It totally made sense.
    And I love to think of life as exciting but hard, or rather hard but exciting.
    May Daniel be this powerhouse forever!

  • Great post! That competitive nature may make things hard on Daniel right now, but I'm sure it will pay off in great dividends later! There is a strong drive for that competitive nature in our family. Just think of all our games when we get together -- Sorry, Mexican Train Dominoes, Rummikub, Bull, Scattergories, etc. Who knows? Daniel may end up winning in all the games as he gets a little older!

    • Thank you Janet! And you are right. He will fit in well with the family for sure!

  • Very wise, indeed. Great post. BTW, that is an awesome looking playground! Also, holding groceries in the double-stroller is a super idea. That's unfortunate that they were out of milk, but glad you all seem to have made it back with the same number of teeth you left home with.

    • "And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ." Phil. 1:6

      • Excellent verse! Good memory! That route to the mini-mart was indeed the sighting of the tooth incident!! It is a remarkable playground. It belongs to a local middle school, believe it or not.

  • "He sees the big picture, just as I can see more of Daniel’s big picture than Daniel can." I love it -- very true and very wise.

  • "Still growing! We might even grow the most from the very circumstances that make us cry!" How lovely April! It is hard wanting to be as grown up as a big brother, but at least he has some really great role models for sure :) Thanks for sharing your sweet post.

Recent Posts

Last Chance to See the Cherry Blossoms in D.C. Before Major Tidal Basin Reconstruction

Did you know 2024 year is an important year for the D.C. Cherry Blossom Festival?…

3 weeks ago

Exploring Our Family History in Tannehill State Park: A Beautiful Place to Take Your Family

Last year my cousin Amber sent me a VHS video clip of an interview she…

4 weeks ago

Traveling by Train from Naples to Sigonella Navy Base (in Sicily)

On the last day before our flight out of Italy, Alan and I needed to…

1 month ago

How to Build a Career as a Fire Rescue Officer

Today I have an expert guest post from the field of fire rescue! He is…

2 months ago

So happy to be back! 13 Lessons from When My Website Crashed

If you visited this website in the past eleven days, you might have seen a…

2 months ago

Stories of Our Boys Top 10 Most Popular Posts of 2023

If you follow both of my websites, you know that I did a top ten…

3 months ago