Daniel scoops up the ball for his tee-ball team.
Alan and I are such a funny pair. People are always calling us “laid back” and fun, and sometimes, when they say that, I wonder, “Wow. Who else do they know because I think we are crazy high stress.”
And that’s just it. It depends on who you’re comparing us to. When we first started out as sports parents, we were just plain dumb about it. We’d over-coach our boys, worry about it when they didn’t want to play, and sign them up for sports they didn’t even like. We’d critique, and teach, and then wonder why our kids didn’t love it at first.
But over the years, we softened our approach. It made a huge difference. We went from having a son who said, “I just don’t want to ruin my own Saturday by signing up for baseball,” to having that same fella’ say, “Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays are my favorite days because that’s when we play baseball.” All in one year!
Alan is pretty much always the coach. Alan has a serious talent for it.
We’ve learned a few grossly important lessons in how to foster a love for sports.
And I do mean zero, especially when your kiddo is playing for the first time, or even the first few years. Do not expect anything at all. They are only learning how to play.
That way you can be over-the-moon excited when they make any good plays or catches or anything whatsoever, which brings me to rule #2.
Caleb, getting ready to run to first base
What you praise can depend on your child’s level too. For a newbie or a struggling athlete, dig deeper.
“Wow!!! You were totally paying attention and watching everything. That was so good!”
“You almost caught that ball that one time. That was great! You are going to be catching it so soon!”
“You are the best batter ever!”
Work with whatever they do. Praise them. I’m always reading articles telling us not to praise kids for their accomplishments. Ludicrous. That’s a super way to end up with a kid who doesn’t want to even try anything because they never feel successful. Trust me. Alan and I have sucked the enthusiasm right out of our children like that in the past, but we are learning!!
Now we are just always so excited.
We’ve been praising Caleb all year long, during the off season of baseball.
“Wow! Caleb you can throw!!! You have an arm. Yow! You gotta sign up for baseball this spring because, man, you are amazing.”
“Great catch!! Shew!! You have got to go back to playing baseball!”
And he did. He couldn’t wait to sign up, but he’s been practicing all winter, so he actually is pretty amazing. He tagged 2 or 3 different kids out as first basemen this past Saturday, and I couldn’t get over how far he has come. Yes, I know I’m his mom. I stand by my assessment. Amazing.
Dan and his best baseball bud
We were all in on it this year. We’d see Caleb’s buddy outside and whisper in his ear, “Please sign up for baseball with Caleb. Y’all can be on the same team. You will love it. Tell your dad.”
Occasionally do extra fun things to celebrate a good game or a new achievement.
And that brings me to our last rule.
A few praises on what they did well that game won’t hurt either.
Most importantly, never despair if it appears your child has no athletic ability. They just need time to develop these skills. We’ve seen so much improvement with each individual season of basketball or whatever sport they try. It just takes time. They need us as their cheerleaders to keep trying and not give up.
And never compare your child to someone else’s. Just love your children for who they are. Who cares if their talent is in a different area than yours is? Keep up the praise. Maybe they will come around. In the mean time, please don’t sit on the sideline yelling instructions out to your five-year-old. It’s just wrong, and it’s a perfect way to kill any love that they may ever have for the game.
Just stick with the praise.
Great job reading!!! 😉 (Kidding, but you get the idea.)
Action shot!
See you at the ball field!
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Celebrating every small victory not only fosters a positive mindset but also fuels a child's passion for sports . Your enthusiastic encouragement, like praising Caleb's progress in baseball, creates a supportive environment where achievements, no matter how minor, become stepping stones to success on the field.
Oh great! This was the first book I read by her and it was pretty good! Also sports romance mostly feature Hockey so it was refreshing to have one for Basketball!
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Thanks a lot for sharing such a great piece of article! I found it a good helpful write-up with a good sound and explanation. Here I got a number of concepts that is definitely helpful to encourage a love for sports in our children. Please keep sharing more updates!
I love that you talked about how parents shouldn't expect anything from their children while they're only starting to learn how to play. I feel like my parents are pressuring my brother too much after learning his interest for baseball. Maybe I can ask them to buy a throwing device for him and see if it would help with his training.
I'm totally happy just seeing my kids play the little league and I love it when they're having fun. I'm proud that they're learning how to become team players and I fully support their passion for the sport.
I need to get better at the praise, but I feel like I am running around chasing a toddler the whole time and miss most of the game. I kind of have to fib a lot and say I saw something they wanted me to see. Someday I will be able to sit and watch, right?
Ha!! I used to be exactly like that. This year I have gotten lucky so far, and JD has mostly stayed where I can see him. But without fail, he always has to go pee behind a tree at some point during the game.
Wonderful advice, because kids just don't come with a manual. I so look forward to seeing them play again.
This is great advice for grandparents too. Thanks. I bet this blog will be quite popular. Glad everyone is enjoying the games more this year.
Thank you! Caleb is especially excited about it. Even Joshua wishes he'd signed up. Maybe there's a fall league where we're going.