20 Reasons I Love Being a Military Spouse

Day 6 of The 12 Days of Jumping into fall and recovering from summer is all about loving the life that you have!

Don’t you love how one of the main themes of fall is thankfulness? What a healthy season! (trick-or-treating aside..) Pumpkins, thankfulness, more tolerable temperatures, beautiful foliage, and fall festivals! What’s not to love???

Being thankful for what you have has to be one of the most powerful sources we have to keep ourselves SANE in this roller coaster world.

We are thankful for many people and things, but today I want to focus on how thankful I am for this unpredictable, hectic, always-changing military life we lead.

Our life has been profoundly impacted by Alan’s military service. This summer my husband reached 16 years of service in the military. Right about that time, we also moved from Georgia to the Washington, D.C. area.

This was our 3rd move in 4 years. Not only that, but Alan brought me home a list of possibilities for his next assignment! So while the cardboard boxes were still on the curb, I was sitting on my sofa setting up my wishlist for where we will move NEXT, a little less than two years from now. In the words of Jack Black on Jumangi, “I can’t even with this.”

I used to look at those lists with excitement. Now I’ll admit the only emotion I felt was tiredness and reluctancy. Move again? Must we? We’ve moved 11 times since we began this journey, and I’ve been with him every step of the way, but can’t I just dig a hole and stay in it already!!!??

And who knows? Maybe he’ll find a local office to work for, and we won’t move at all. One can certainly hope.

Many many years ago, Alan was a young captain, considering leaving the Army. The deployment tempo was high. He was headed back to Iraq, and our duty station in Alabama was miserable. Alan thought if he quit the Army, it would make me happy.

But I knew better. I never hated the Army, and I’ve always wanted Alan to have a job that he enjoys, which for him is the Army. Finding a job you love can be a hard thing to do, and he’s found his. I would never take that away from him.

So here are the 20 reasons I love being a military spouse, even when it may make me momentarily want to scream.

#21. G.I. Bill!!

This one should actually be much higher up on the list, so we’ll just say this list isn’t in any kind of order.

Alan signed his G.I. Bill over to be used by dependents, so we at least have one of the four children’s college paid for. That’s a very big deal!

#20. Our children are interesting, well educated young people.

Redwood trees and sequoias so big you can drive a car through them? They haven’t only read about those. They touched them and stepped inside of them.

The differences between the beaches on the Pacific coast and the Gulf of Mexico? They could tell you volumes.

Rafts of Sea lions and pods of dolphins swimming with humpback whales? We got to see those in action too. Did you know that those smaller water mammals follow the whales around in the ocean while they feed?

Stereotypes? Psssshh  My kids can tell you that from D.C. to California, from Alabama to..okay we really haven’t been very far north…people are mostly the same.

#19. I probably have HALF as much junk as someone who moves maybe only every 7 years.

We always clean out every knick and cranny of the house when we pack up and again when we unpack!

#18. Our boys have amazing social skills.

They are still shy and quiet sometimes, yes. But I think that’s a good thing. When you move every few years, you learn how to make friends and make them quickly, but not hastily. First, you observe your surroundings for just who it is you actually want to be friends with.

One of my sons even had to deal with a bully last year, but he held his own and created his own group in the process that was neither the “popular crowd” nor the outcasts. I was so proud of him.

#17. You learn something different from each person that you befriend.

Having lived in so many different places and starting over again and again, we’ve met way more people than if we had stayed in one spot.

From one family, we learned about lacrosse. From another, hilarious jokes. The list goes on: life in Hawaii, generosity, Catholicism, crawlfish, Chick-fil-a inner workings–Did you know that there are people who camp out at Chick fil a grand openings to score free chicken?

#16. Free Health Care (This one could also be #1..It’s a big deal.)

Yes, we like to gripe about our looooong pharmacy wait times, short clinic hours, and unpredictable service. But a lot of that you’d get anywhere, and the fact is that you can’t beat free.

I gave birth to 4 babies for free. Alan had PRK eye surgery for free. (Okay, they need to cut that out and switch to Lasik like everyone else, but that’s another topic for another day..)

Tricare has paid for plenty of MRIs and x-rays too. I never paid a dime for those. Free health care rocks!!!!!

Now if we could just stay in one place long enough for a doctor to finish evaluating my heart problem, it’d save me a lot of confusion.

#15. Military Discounts

Many stores will actually give us a discount for being active duty military, and that’s exciting, especially at Lowe’s!

#14.  Military Balls

Supposedly, there are frequently fancy dinners we call balls. I say supposedly because while I often see photos of my friends at these, I haven’t been to one since 2007. What’s the deal with that, Alan? Take your wife dancing.

#13. Good Dental Plan

Don’t ask me about braces, though. I will know soon enough. We have two kids approaching that hurdle soon.

Dental is important! More money saved!

#12. Disney Discounts

Yes, I know I mentioned discounts already, but since Disney is…well, Disney. I thought it deserved its own number.

There’s even a special resort on Disney World property just for military personnel and their families! We’ve never actually stayed there because as a family of 6 we require a ginormous room. (Ask me about the Art of Animation suites sometimes—AMAZING!)

#11. Overseas Travel Options

I always know if a friend has lived in Germany or not when I enter their home. How I love all the beautiful Polish pottery and European furniture they bring back with them, along with the BMW in their driveway.

We’ve never been stationed overseas because we’ve never asked to be, but how awesome is it that it’s an option?

Our former nanny, Analise, has spent the past 2 years living in Italy with the Airforce, and it looked like she had the time of her life.

#10.  Aafes Gas!!

Aafes stores, as in the PX, BX, etcetera do not seem to be much cheaper than any other store to me. But gas definitely is a better deal than in the civilian sector, so we love our Aafes “shopettes.”

#9. Safe, sidewalk neighborhoods– Living on post!

I love living on post. We don’t currently because we chose our home based on schools, but we have spent many years living on post. Military base living is a sweet deal. There are always sidewalks. You have a ton in common with every single one of your neighbors. The base usually has a hospital, a grocery store, a PX/BX, a gas station, a gym, and walking trails.

Best of all, when you move, which you always do…the move out procedure is simple and predictable. You know exactly what is expected. Basically, you just hand them some money, they clean it for you, and they do a walk through to make sure there’s nothing broken, and you go. Love!!!!

#8. The Commissary

I occasionally hear someone complain about this marvelous place, and I have to keep my face from looking at them like they have three eyeballs.

The commissary is my FAVE!!!! Meat is cheaper. Produce is GOOD and WAY cheaper. Boxed goods are reasonable. Coupons are everywhere throughout the store, and they will bring in regional foods from all over the world to make their oh-so-cosmopolitan customer base happy. What is not to like?

Oh, the bagger thing. You do have to tip the bagger. Buy produce and meat, and the savings will make up for it.

#7. Playgrounds everywhere

You know what else military bases always have? Playgrounds everywhere. It’s as though there’s some kind of building code that says per every 40 households there must be a unique playground. Hmmm..maybe there is some sort of regulation on that..

#6. Free gym!

You have to live or work close enough to base to take advantage of it, but you can’t beat free gym membership. No, there’s not childcare. I used to go only when Alan got home from work. Some gyms even have classes you can sign up for, like Pilates or Spin.

#5. For love of country

I recently read a person’s rant saying that being a military spouse is not service to your country. I was like, “Say whaaa?” She’s entitled to her opinion, but I think it’s laughable. Tell that to the young mom who hasn’t seen her husband in 15 months. Meanwhile, she’s on 24 hour toddler duty, Christmas decorating duty, and allll the potty training and dog poop scooping, all so that her husband can fight for our country. You’re going to say that is not patriotic service? Oh honey, that IS service.

If she didn’t do that service, her spouse would have to come home for “Lack of family care plan,” taking another soldier out of the fight. Therefore, yes, it counts.

As far as that goes, military kids are also rendering a patriotic service. They are sacrificing having a parent for months or a year at a time, for our country. My oldest two boys have sacrificed a total of 21 months of deployed parent service, and that’s only counting the time that their daddy was actually overseas fighting while they went on without having a father in the home, not counting all the time they were gone for training.

So yes, being a military family is a patriotic service.

There’s a song, I forget the name of it, but it’s about a child missing their military parent at Christmas. It’s one of those that touches a nerve so hard, my kids will stand up and scream at you until you turn it off if they hear it. It’s just too painful for them to listen to after all they’ve endured.

#4. Community!!!

There’s an instant bonding between military families, which is part of the reason living on post is so much fun. When we lived in Navy housing in California, it was downright magical. I’m not even exaggerating.

The kids ran from house to house playing with each other. They biked all over the neighborhood. Our oldest could even run down to the shoppette for us to buy milk or bread. Sometimes I’d dream up errands for him to run just to give him a job to do.

Women on my street were all sharing the burden of raising families with a husband in graduate school. We did Thanksgiving together, birthdays, ball games, you name it. Most of us even ended up moving away around the same time, and I’ll never forget how empty and sad the street looked.

Those are friends for life. We could see them tomorrow and pick right up where we left off.

Actually most of them got together this past weekend in Virginia, as Laura was evacuated from the hurricane in North Carolina.

#3. Free Over the Counter Medicines

You can’t make this stuff up. If I go to the doctor for, say my bad hip, they will maybe prescribe me physical therapy and Lidocaine patches, but they will also give me free bottles of over-the-counter Advil or Tylenol. I will have to wait an hour for those to be ready, but hey, it’s free!

#2. Retirement Benefits

With my medical history, I’d be completely out of luck if I didn’t have Alan’s health insurance through the Army, and when we get out, that will still be there for us. Thank goodness!

If you do your 20 years, you get the healthcare insurance, the Commissary usage, and a nice retirement paycheck for the rest of your life. It’s one of our most comforting benefits!

#1. The Adventure

Yep, we love the adventure. Moving is my favorite and least favorite part of being a military spouse. You HAVE to choose to see it as an adventure and get out and explore each new area. This is what makes the nomad life doable!!

For our last move, we got a new kind of adventure. We returned to a place we’ve lived before, for the first time ever. My fourth son was able to start kindergarten at the same school my first son started kindergarten 7 years ago.

We moved back into the very same neighborhood we lived in before. I can’t tell you what a comforting feeling it was to return to our old paths. I have friends all over the neighborhood, and I love it. This must be what it feels like to stay in one place and actually know people. To see these 12-year-olds and be able to say, “I knew him before he started kindergarten,” is just so exciting for me.

I’m soaking it in and enjoying it as much as I can because it won’t be long before we are off on our next grand adventure!