stay-at-home mom

It’s Okay to Do Absolutely Nothing When Facing Big Changes

I had this room all set up for virtual school, but I ended up changing much of it.

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Do any of you ever feel so subconsciously overwhelmed that you just feel like doing nothing?

This week I definitely did not do “absolutely nothing.” In fact, I picked up all the boys’ school-issued materials for virtual school, set up and then re-set up work areas, and figured out how to work these new Chromebooks. That was a lot of things that I DID accomplish.

But it didn’t feel like I was getting so much stuff done, even though I was. I had so little energy most of the time.

And this morning, now that all the obvious things are done, I find myself wanting to seriously do absolutely nothing at all. My head feels sleepy, though I am not sleep deprived. There is almost zero energy in me, and I cannot think of any reasonable explanation for feeling so bleh.

My best guess is that my mind is more stressed than I realize, so my body is acting tired. Have any of you felt that lately?

Another monumental life change is charging towards our house like a bull charging towards a matador. Virtual School!!! I am over here feeling like I am standing with the red cape, bracing for impact, because no way do I actually know how to manage this bull…

Only the funny thing is we are all more prepared than we think we are. We did a bigger version of this back in the spring. Back then, there were no live classes, but we had to coach our children through their assigned tasks.

See, it is important to think these positive kind of thoughts because the fact is that I am sure there will be days when none of this goes right, and we NEED to scream.

I ordered myself a back to school gift. You have to see Hamilton to get it, but Hamilton is on Disney Plus. Watch it. It’s every bit as good as they say!

This morning I was watching my husband out in the backyard, weed-eating, trimming shrubs, and coaching the boys through the lawn mowing. I thought, “He isn’t sitting on the sofa reading the same posts on Facebook over and over again. Where does he find this energy? What’s wrong with me? Why can’t I feel like that?”

Comparing yourself to others is always a terrible idea.

Yes, Alan scaled mountains this morning and had 12,000 steps logged by 11 am. He is not facing the enormous changes the rest of us are here this week. Yes, the boys are his kids too, but during virtual school, Alan does not even know what website they go to to log in each day. Nor does he already have the attendance start times memorized for each boy, along with their teachers’ names. I do not say this to knock Alan. We have equally important roles, but we don’t both try to do all the same things. That would be counterproductive.

Alan will be spending the first day of school working hard in our master bedroom-turned-home office. He makes enough money for both of us, and we need that. Team work makes the dream work. This week matters to Alan, but he is not the matador in the virtual school situation. He has different bulls to worry about, though he does support me in my bull-managing role as well.

I take comfort in the fact that back when Alan was facing returning to work after our two-week vacation, he too was sitting on the sofa all day, playing his Township app.

I’m telling you, doing nothing is a natural human response when facing a large, dreaded task.

I did work hard to set up all their school supplies stuff, but I took a lot of “out of energy now” breaks…

Don’t feel bad if you find yourself playing seemingly useless apps or sitting on your porch staring at your flowers. This is how we cope! Letting your mind have time to think, process, and prepare is a very healthy thing to do.

There are actual research studies that support the health benefits of doing nothing, but I was too tired to read very much of them. haaaa! But you can read all about it here at Ivy Exec or here at Elle magazine.

Pooh said this in that Pooh movie that came out a year or two ago.

I thought Pooh’s words said it well enough.

You guys take the time to enjoy your Labor Day weekend! The week with all of its demands will be waiting for us on Tuesday, and we will handle that then. Happy Labor Day, friends!

It will be okay. Virtual school surely cannot be as bad as the valley of the shadow of death. HA!!! Nevertheless, God IS with us.

We are all going to find a way to make this work, and when things get rough, we will pray! I never cease to be amazed with how quickly God answers my prayers.

If you haven’t joined our Virtual School and Newbies’ Home School Support Group on Facebook , be sure to join us! It is called Schooling at Home. We are a safe place to talk about this new reality of education that we are all facing together, and we’d love to have you pull up a seat at our table.

aprilmomoffour

April is an upbeat, Christian, blog-obsessed, military wife, and home schooling mom of four little boys. She writes about education, travel, and humorous adventures in parenting. Follow along if you’d like a little bit of encouragement and a whole lot of crazy.

View Comments

  • April, I love your writing style. You turn every situation into an enjoyable read. Praying all goes well in virtual school. Take care of that hip.

  • Wise words. Thank you for reassuring me that it is okay to have a quiet moment when I do nothing, now and then. Even took a nap one afternoon this week. I am always trying to get through a to-do list and sometimes my list and I would both be better served if I just slowed down a little. All of those pointy yellow pencils made me smile.

  • I watched the YouTube video. The da, dat, ya, etc is definitely not Beethoven, I was mistaken!

    Like you, I've heard of The Pilgrims Progress all by life. I read it last year and it is a real classic.

  • OMG that mug! And yes, I'm prone to complete paralysis when overwhelmed. It's a real problem.

    • Thank you! I knew I’m not the only one with overwhelm paralysis. We got this though. Right? Yes, yes we do.

  • I think I am the same. Definitely more stressed out that I think I am. Over time it starts to impact on the body and energy levels. So love that cup.

  • That mug is awesome!

    Yes for sure lately my mind is a hot mess. I am kind of a perpetual doer, but I find my doing is less than helpful when it is like that. Sometimes it is best to sit and process.

  • I looked at your Hamilton cup. I read the da, dat, ya, etc. Then it dawned on me it's the opening lines of Beethoven;s 5th Symphony. I'm I right? (This is not a hint that I want one.)

    Sometimes the best option is to do nothing. Sometimes it's best to do the bare minimum. I totally agree.

    When I read Psalm 23:4 I was reminded of The Pilgrim's Progress by John Bunyan. Have you ever read it? I read it about a year ago.

    • lol. You live with a prolific gift-giver and therefore find it necessary to clarify it's not a hint that you want one. That's funny. In order to understand the cup you have to see Hamilton, but for reference here is a link to a YouTube video of just part of the performance. The king George character in the play is a comedic element of the performance, so he's a favorite. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ti8xeyaSwCI&list=RDTi8xeyaSwCI&start_radio=1
      I have seen The Pilgrim's Progress quoted in so many places, but I've never actually read it. I'm sure it's good.

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