Is anyone else feeling nervous about their kids beginning virtual school? I feel like this is an issue that parents across the entire world are dealing with.

We have been out of school for the sheltering-in-place or quarantine or social distancing, whatever you want to call it, for a month now. Seriously. An entire month has passed.

During that month, we here in Maryland were given home-school packets of suggested work. Thankfully, they gave us all the benefit of the doubt and gave the children all 100s on daily grades for the work done on the packets. So far it has all had a very laid back feel. Yes, we are home schooling, but the oldest boys don’t even really have math. The younger boys haven’t had much science.

We recently added in BrainPOP.com videos when I found out that their service is currently free. Plus, we read and write and do a few other things. School at our house has been fun, really. I mean, it has been fun for the kids and sometimes even for me, but all of the monkeys have been on my back. It has definitely been a lot of work. We have four kids, and they all have different assignments. I spend each day doing school with them, feeding them, and then planning out what we will do the next day.

I have had less time to do house work and writing. That’s for sure, but it has been doable.

Next week everything changes.

Wednesday we will start virtual school. The kids will watch videos of their teachers teaching them on our computers, and they will have to actually complete the assignments the teachers give them.

Everything reminds me of a song. Sometimes my kids take it as a challenge and try to throw out random phrases to see if I can find a song that relates, and I assure you, I always can.

Today I am Elsa, of Frozen II, and we are all on a collision course straight “Into the Unknown.”

Virtual school is the unknown, and we are headed there fast, and I don’t know whether to be terrified or happy! Up to this point, if I thought the packet-suggested science questions were ridiculous, I just tossed them out and used a different science lesson that I chose for them myself.

I won’t get to do that anymore. Yet, it won’t be like sending them to school all day long either. I may not choose the activities, but I WILL be the one who has to make sure they do said activity, and if they cannot figure out how to do it, their project becomes my project in many ways. You know?

And then there’s the computer sharing in this house…

When this all started, we had a family of six, with three iPhones and two computers to use. Once the home-schooling began, I ordered a new Kindle Fire tablet to replace our old one, and that has been a life-saver. When they announced that school was about to go to virtual classes, we decided to go ahead and order a new computer. So now we have a 3:5 computer ratio, which is a huge improvement, but I’m still nervous about everyone trying to share them.

“The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. He makes me lie down in green pastures. He leads me beside still waters. He restores my soul. He leads me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.

Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies; you anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life, and I shall dwell in the house of the LoRD forever. “

Psalm 23

So many unknowns

Our county school system has not given us any information about what to expect next week. Thankfully, ONE teacher did send us what he plans to do. That’s for 8th grade math, so he is planning to do live classes for his students, there days per week. He’s already given times and instructions.

We love this teacher. I am thankful he is doing these live classes, and my oldest son will actually have math again. It was easy to dig up math for my elementary boys. I didn’t even bother to try with the 8th grader. Inventing functions and such is not really in my wheelhouse anymore. I will happily wash my hands of it.

But what if they all need the computer at the same time?

And exactly how many videos will each boy have to watch each day? The first grader, I’m hoping, will only have 2 videos each day. Our third grader has three different teachers for his subjects, not including music and such. Both middle school boys have seven classes each. That could mean making time for as many as 20 or more video classes per day! And then there are assignments!

See, I think about this stuff, and my heart beats faster, and my hair gets grayer, and my jaws clench. My teeth grind. It’s all a messy stress and worry reaction.

Then I remind myself.

It is going to be okay. They, as a public school, must know that these students are all sharing electronic devices with siblings. Surely, they will continue to be more laid back than usual.

My sixth grader’s French teacher who let them take a test over the phone to final out their grades, and before he gave the test, he went over it all first. He basically told him all the answers before he asked the questions, and I was SO grateful.

What we are facing is not unique to our family. It’s the whole world going through this together.

Sure, each area handles it a little differently, but it’s all similar. What about the families who only have ONE computer and several children? Or the families who cannot afford to buy a new device to get through this? How about all the people who have lost their jobs and aren’t even sure how they will pay for next week’s food or electric bill?

Those are bigger problems than I am dealing with. We are very fortunate that Alan has been able to work at home, and I always am at home.

When I face uncertainty, which is a constant in my life, I always go back to faith in God.

As a military wife, we’ve been waiting for the Army, going where they send us, never knowing where we’ll be next year, for the past 18 years. Uncertainty is what we do.

I trust in the Lord. He knows. I am just a pawn, along for the ride. That’s how I often see my life. The roller coaster is taking off again, but I have my seatbelt on. I trust the one who is in charge. God is still in heaven, and he will always take care of those who call in his name. Getting upset or griping about it is not going to make coronavirus go away or your neighbor’s response any different.

“The LORD is a stronghold for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. And those who know your name put their trust in you, for you, O LORD, have not forsaken those who seek you.”

Psalm 9:9-10

I will not spend too much time worrying about this because focusing in on a problem only seems to make the problem grow. Once we have all the information, we will build a schedule then. Until then, we will enjoy the weekend. Maryland’s “spring break” is Friday through Tuesday. Isn’t that odd? This state does not get a week-long spring break.

We are going to take that time off from school. The boys will spend way too much time on video games. I will work on writing my next book, and I’m sure we will play some Ticket to Ride and do a good deal of baking and eating.

The Lord will take care of us. He will take care of you too, if you trust in him. In the meantime, we should all enjoy the spring as much as we can.

********************

Funny Quarantine Quotes from the Week:

“Ohhh, you say it like bunt pan?? All this time I thought you were saying butt pan!” (John David)

“Do y’all know the story of Rapunzel at all?”

“Ohhh yeah, was she the girl who couldn’t eat her soup??” (Daniel)

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Digging in to Biblical Archaeology…

One of my favorite things to read about is archaeological finds that have something to do with the Bible–anything to do with the Bible! These historical artifacts are not the reason that I believe, but they do substantiate and reinforce and inform my beliefs. They spur me on in my awe and wonder of this book we call The Holy Bible.

For me, the biggest reason for my faith is that God has been there for me. He always has. He has provided for my needs, and you can’t doubt someone who has answered your prayers time and time again. It makes anyone’s denial of a supernatural God laughable to me. I’ve seen God’s work too much to be faithless.

The Bible itself is the greatest testament to a living, breathing, loving God because the writings of the Bible are ancient, well-preserved, and there are 100s of these ancient texts, all in agreement with one another. It’s incredible in and of itself, and you can read more about that in this article that I wrote last year about why the Bible is reliable.

There are 100s of archaeological finds that are in agreement with the Bible, but today let’s focus on one: the Nuzi Tablets.

The Nuzi Tablets

These tablets were discovered in modern-day northern Iraq, or as you know it in ancient history, Mesopotamia. Nuzi was an administrative center. The tablets contain family archives from families in Nuzi in the years 1450-1350 BC. The information on the tablets spans 6 generations and describe social and economic customs as well as religious and legal institutions for people called the Hurrians. The Hurrians were also known as the Horites, Hivites, and Jebusites.

Family records were clearly highly valued by these people, a rare thing for that time period, outside of the Hebrew people. There are tons of similiarities between the way these ancient people did things and the way that the patriarchs of Israel did them.

Why would the people of Israel have anything in common with the people in Nuzi?

Well, Abraham was from Mesopotamia (modern-day Iraq), and Nuzi was in Mesopotamia as well. This was not that far away from where Abraham grew up. Naturally, the customs of the people of Nuzi would be highly similar to the customs of Abraham’s family.

The Nuzis even had the word “Habiru,” referring to a group of landless people who wandered. Scholars suggest that this could be the origin of the word “Hebrew.”

Here’s the basic quick facts about the Nuzi Tablets. I made a little infograph:

The tablets offer a surprising explanation of the term “sister.”

A woman could be adopted by a man as his sister, giving her more rights than if she were only his wife. That sounds so WEIRD today. But it gets even weirder. A man could adopt his wife as his sister, and he’d be giving her that status so that she would have more rights.

Remember, this is over 3,000 years ago. Also, in Genesis, Abraham and Isaac both asked their wives to tell different kings that they were afraid of that they were their “sister.” To the kings in the area of Egypt, that meant what it means to us. But to people further into the East, where Abraham was born and raised, perhaps it meant something else entirely, as the tablets of Nuzi describe.

The tablets also describe the process of surrogate mothers, which is what Abraham’s wife Sarah did with her maid servant Hagar in Genesis 16.

Household idols are also discussed on these tablets, which explains the story of Rachel stealing her father’s household god and Laban being so upset about it. See, according to the tablets of Nuzi, if a father-in-law gave his son-in-law his household god, that meant that he was appointing him as his heir. Laban certainly did not intend to appoint Jacob as his heir, so Rachel was potentially doing more than grabbing a souvenir from her father’s house. She could have actually been trying to make herself and Jacob the principal heirs of her father’s estate, rather than her actual brothers, Laban’s own sons. Obviously, Laban was having no part of this.

The Nuzi tablets give us a whole other picture and context by which to understand the Old Testament. These stories took place over 3,000 years ago, and are therefore often very hard to comprehend.

I don’t know about you, but this is a topic I’d love to learn more about. If you’re interested, I’ve listed my sources below, so you can read up. This makes me want to go back to the Bible Museum to check for displays of the Nuzi tablets.

Sources:

Rose Book of Bible Charts, Maps, & Timelines  100 Proofs of the Bible Chart

Nuzi by Mark Chavalas on oxfordbibliographies.com

Great Discoveries in Biblical Archaeology: The Nuzi Tablets by Bryant G. Wood, PhD. Feb., 2006, on biblearchaeology.org

Clay Tablet and Envelope, image description, by Jennie Myers at teachingmiddleeast.lib.uchicago.edu

Nuzi at jewishvirtuallibrary.org

Nuzi at biblicaltraining.org

The Holy Bible, book of Genesis

***Ad disclaimer: When you purchase through my ads I sometimes collect advertising fees, when I’m lucky. All opinions are my own.**

If you enjoy reading about antiquities and the Middle East, you will love my book. It was released in March, 2020, Tour Israel in Pictures and Stories.  It’s now for sale on Amazon. Click here to check it out.

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Starting a new school in a new land is harder than I anticipated, but I felt like day 2 actually went very well for all the boys.

School started back yesterday. 

This was an exciting event that I’d finished in high gloss and framed in my mind as a victorious day ushering in a new era for me.

Without a single pre-schooler following me around I will have a spotless house, serve gourmet dinners, volunteer at their school, and run wild and free through grassy meadows.

Hurrah! Hurrah! Hurrah!

High expectations. I love to do that to myself.

Three years ago, my heart began to give me trouble, so I saw a cardiologist, and she told me not to exercise until we’d figured out what was going on with my heart.

We’ve never fully figured out what is causing my v-tach episodes, but they gave me back my freedom to exercise. Phew!

That lasted for about 6 months, and then my general practitioner took away my exercise again. “Only exercise in water. Otherwise, your joints are going to get worse and worse.”

Limitations. I hate them. Who doesn’t?

Anyway, am I not too young for such physical limitations and too old to have silly, unrealistic expectations?

For two years, I did not exercise. Occasionally, I’d rebel, suffer the pain of it, and reform. Meanwhile, my weight packed on at lightning speed.

I’ve come to see myself as this overweight, tired lady with a ticking-time-bomb heart and deflated dreams.

Lovely, eh? That’s disgruntled, disappointed, low self-esteem at its best.

But this hope of having a whole 6.5 hours/day to accomplish things alone drove me.

“I can lose the weight.”

“I can walk so much and do so many weight-bearing exercises (with small weights) that I can’t possibly mess it up with chocolate chip cookies.”

“Alan will love how clean the house is, and he will be impressed with me.”

“My blog will thrive again because I will have so much time to pour into it.”

“The sky’s the limit! I can do anything I want!”

“I’ll finally go get that MRI I was supposed to get a month ago and show the cardiologist how good my heart is doing.”

Some of these thoughts are healthy, I think. You gotta have drive to get through life, ya know?

And yet, you know what is inevitable with hopes of this sort? Disappointment. Problems. Unmet expectations.

Back to school day one wasn’t even over before Daniel developed strep throat. So guess who isn’t at home slaying all these accomplishments today? Me.

Daniel said, “No, I just want to sit in here with you, on the sofa.”

For 5 hours, I basically just sat with Daniel and cuddled on the couch. We watched Ninjago and Peter Rabbit and looked at old family photos of vacations at Legoland and the beach.

I still enjoyed it, but normally I would’ve cherished it so much more because I wouldn’t have had all these unmet goals in my head.

So no, today I did not impress my husband or anyone else for that matter. I have no idea what we will be eating for dinner. I actually fell asleep in Daniel’s bed around 1pm and woke up to see a giant block tower with farm fences built beside the bed and Daniel downstairs playing the x-box.

If I don’t get strep throat myself, it’s a miracle. Plus, I’m playing chauffeur tonight, which I rather despise, so I’m dreading that.

But God knew this all along, didn’t he? He knew my freedom would have a brief interlude. He knew I’d make grand plans that would fill me with disappointment when they came crashing down in front of me.

It’s actually serving as a good reminder to me, though it doesn’t feel like anything “good,” because I so desperately wanted to be wonderfully productive this week.

The thing is life isn’t about accomplishments, exercise, to do lists, or gourmet meals. Life is about love and people. That’s what life is about.

Yes, you heard it. I am DEFINING life right here on my little, low-traffic blog!!  And I dare you to argue with me. Ha! Because this time I’m right. (Maybe just this once, okay?)

Life is about love and people, so when you look at it this way, perhaps I am a smashing, unexpectedly amazing success after all because that is exactly what this day was about. Love and Daniel, and he is a person.

Just look at your life through that lens when it feels like you don’t have an accomplishment to your name. What’s success anyway, if it isn’t about love?

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. ² If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing. ³ If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.    1 Corinthians 13: 1-3

You might think, “No, April. Love and God.”

Well, yes, but if you love God then you must love people. You SHOULD love God most of all, but you should display that by loving his people. How can any of us love God, who we can’t see, if we don’t love people, who are right in front of us?

After all that’s what the Bible teaches:

Thus I am reminded to be content, no more like empowered, to show love and maybe only achieve 1 or 2 things from my list, or maybe none at all. I can work on this list any day at all, but Daniel needs me TODAY.

I hope you’re having a good day too, loving God and people. I’ll bet you’re way more of a smashing success than you think you are!

The post Disappointments and Limitations: Starting a New School in a New State appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.

Museum of the Bible, Washington, D.C.

New Museum

This past year a new museum opened up in downtown Washington, D.C., in between all the federal buildings, metro stops, and Starbucks. In fact, this museum shares brick with the Federal Center Southwest Metro stop, making it an extremely convenient destination!

The Museum of the Bible is only a few blocks away from the United States Capitol building!

Alan and I discussed visiting it, but we weren’t overly motivated. After all, was it literally a museum full of Bibles? I mean, we love God’s word and all, but how do you make a museum out of books? That sounds more like a library.

Well, last week, I finally realized that I was about to lose ALL of my freedom. Alan was headed back to work, and all four children are out of school for the summer for two MORE months.

I suddenly knew I HAD to get out right away!

At the first opportunity, I made my escape, not even sure where I was going. I only knew I was headed to downtown Washington, D.C. Somewhere between my house and the metro station, I decided upon the Bible museum, rather than visiting any of the Smithsonians, which I’ve seen a dozen times.

Metro Stop

Federal Center Southwest. It’s on the blue, orange, and silver lines, and it literally puts you out on the opposite end of the same building that houses the Bible Museum. At the top of the escalator, round either corner. Don’t cross any streets. Walk to the end of the building. You are there.

Pssst… you can download this app to help you navigate the D.C. Metro system. It’s also available for Apple devices.

Ticket Prices

Adult: $15

Kids 12 & Under: $10

No, I did not buy tickets in advance. I went inside and purchased at the counter, and I only had to wait behind 2 people.

How big is this place?

Much bigger than I thought. And thankfully, it was much more than just a giant museum of Bibles. Ha! I’m going to tell you what my favorite parts were, so if you only have a couple of hours you can cut right to the chase.

I have to admit that most of my favorite parts were the ones I couldn’t photograph. Sorry!! I did see one man cheating with his phone at his hip to take the forbidden photos, sort of like a certain one of Alan’s aunts always does….but y’all know I’m actually not much of a rebel..

But I will do my best to TELL you about those not-to-miss exhibits, even if I didn’t get a photo.

Let’s start with the first exhibit you come to after getting ticketed..the room of paintings and displays that are:

On loan from the Vatican

(!!! Wow. Sounds so official, right? These have to be good.)

circa 1209

So much of this room was lost on me because I did not find this display key until after I had walked around and looked at the paintings, not knowing what they meant.

Lesson learned: In the Vatican room, find the key to the RIGHT of the doors (I tend to always go left) before you peruse the gallery.

key that explains what each of the paintings are about

While I was in the Vatican room, I kept hearing loud bumps and such, and I thought, “What is there, a daycare above my head??”

No. Turns out it was this:

I actually don’t know what all goes on in here, but it sounded like fun. I was child free that day, so I passed on this.

Obviously, when I do take my children to the Museum of the Bible I will be spending plenty of time in the children’s experience wing, which I can tell you with strong certainty is adjacent to the Vatican gallery. Ha!!

The next exhibits I went through were about how Bible affects our culture, how the Bible has affected America (greatly), and the history of printing Bibles.

Those were three different large galleries.

This is a huge interactive computer display where you can take polls and see the results.

Freedom is a major theme throughout the Bible as well as American history. People on both sides of these issues have often sought to use the Bible to back up their views, but the people in this Freedom display used the Bible in the name of freedom.

The Bible & How it Affects Us

George Washington Carver is a big deal where I grew up (in the deep south where growing peanuts became profitable in place of cotton). He was a godly man dedicated to science and the Bible.

This section had hundreds of personal testimonies of how the Bible affected their lives as well as stories of important historical figures and their faith.

History of the Bible

I thought it was cool to see this replica of the Gutenberg press:

painting of the shepherds visiting baby Jesus

Naturally, I enjoyed this exhibit of Christianity in fashion. I love clothes.

In the elevator, there is this beautiful moving photo. I mean it actually moves.

What do you call that? Like a mini-video..a gif?

How I miss Israel. Someday let’s go back!

The Cafe!!!

The Mediterranean Clam Chowder!!!! LOVE!!! This is what I ordered. Photo from the Museum of the Bible.

Okay, I don’t know what this says about me, but the museum cafe was one of my FAVORITE parts of the museum. You can find it on the top floor. They had a variety of Mediterranean food, some things I had not seen since my trip to Israel, as well as regular American options. I found the food to be affordable and delicious.

On that same floor (the 6th), I took a stroll around and came upon this beautiful room, which I didn’t even realize the museum had:

This loooong window provides views of the Capitol, the Library of Congress, and the National Monument.

That dome-like thing on the right is the Library of Congress. The one on the left is the Capitol.

Those domes are Smithsonian museums on the National Mall.

the Washington Monument

I thoroughly enjoyed soaking this in and taking pictures for my fellow tourists.

Right next to the long window on the 6th floor I found this exhibit of antiquities from Israel.

The long-term exhibit is called History and Archaeology of Ancient Israel, and it was my 2nd favorite part of the museum.

This is a real, Egyptian-style mummy found in Canaan, estimated from around 1100 BC.

I took photos of a few other ancient artifacts, to include altars, coins, and ancient writings, both Biblical and non Biblical.

The one in the center with the 4 corners is an Israeli altar. I can’t recall what the others are.

Egyptian account of the same stories found in the Bible. I love this sort of archaeological find!!

Oops!! So interesting, but I didn’t get a photo of the actual amulets. The description was exciting to me, so I focused more on it.

You can read more about the silver scrolls, which are even older than the Dead Sea scrolls, at this article I wrote here.

Next I went through the Hebrew Bible Experience.

No photos were allowed in this video/exhibit tour. It was a retelling of the high points of the Old Testament. This tour takes 30 minutes.

I thoroughly enjoyed the Old Testament tour.

The Jesus of Nazareth exhibit, New Testament Theatre, and the Washington Revelations attraction are all on the 3rd floor, and I was running out of time. The museum was about to close!!

Washington Revelations

So I paid the $5 fee to see the Washington Revelations. I figured if it cost extra, it must be good, right???

It was SO fun. This is not for babies and toddlers, though, sad to say. It is more like a simulator/ride like you’d find at Disney or Universal. In fact, it reminded me of the Soarin’ ride at Epcot.

You stand and hold on to this fly board in front of you, but you never leave your spot. It’s just that the floor tilts around with what’s showing on the screen so that you feel like you are flying through Washington, D.C., looking at the many scripture references throughout the monuments and buildings in the city.

It was exhilarating. Two thumbs up here, but I don’t think John David (my youngest) will be big enough for it yet.

What I Missed!!

I was rather dismayed in researching for this post to realize that I missed some of the best stuff. Here’s what I wish I’d made it to:

•  New Testament Theatere, lasts 8 minutes, on the 3rd floor
• Stations of the Cross, by artist Gib Singleton, the crucifixion story illustrated in miniature statues

I think the Stations of the Cross is temporary too.

Make sure you don’t miss these!!

1. Washington Revelations– It was my favorite just because it was fun. (floor 3)
2.  Actually ALL of the 3rd floor. Just go there first.
3. 6th floor: That’s where I found the enormous viewing room, the restaurant, and the antiquities exhibit!

So basically hit the 3rd and 6th floors first, in my humble opinion. I think the basement actually had the Stations of the Cross, which I missed.

To learn more, see the webpage for the Museum of the Bible.

I did leave time to browse the gift shop by the exit, of course. I bought a cute little blue and white dish that was exactly like the ones we saw when we were souvenir shopping in Israel last summer.

Then I took a sweltering walk over to the Capitol building since it was so close.

…and I let a nice tourist take my photo for me.

I hope you get to visit the Museum of the Bible soon too!

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It’s been a month now since we moved into our new home in Virginia. It’s been 6 months since I blogged regularly, and there is so much I could tell you, I almost don’t know where to begin!

This move, our 10th as a military family, is complete. We are still fulfilling medical requirements and registering for things like school in the fall, but for the most part, we are finished.

It’s time to get back to blogging, which I can’t wait to do!

If you live nearby, and I haven’t paid you a visit yet, don’t worry, I will. And if you were afraid (or relieved-ha) I had given up writing completely, let me assure you that I haven’t.

I needed time off to focus on my family and this move, but at this point I’m really just sitting around playing the Jeopardy app on my phone, so… time to get back to work, eh?

Good-bye, Old House. Our Georgia friends will always hold a special place in our hearts.

End-of-year gifts from John David. Good-bye Pre-school.

Hello, moving boxes, you old rascal you.

Hello, RV and hotel stays.

Good-bye dear friends. Thank you for being there for us. I love this Georgia-shaped cutting board I received as a parting gift.

Hello again, moving truck. Better late than never… This is the tree-sized limb that almost fell on my rental car on moving day but missed it by a hair. Thank you, Lord, that it missed!! And thank you to my friends and neighbors who helped me clean up the debris.

Hello, new kitchen and hello to you too, you dear old boxes. Every single one of you showed up unharmed.

“Sometimes you gotta go where everybody knows your name…”

Returning to this place has been even more magical for us than I even dared hope.  The boys are running around with other boys all day long. The trampoline, which was mostly unused the past two years, is back in daily play. Bicycles are being ridden again. The sounds of children playing Nerf-war games echoes through my house.

Ahhhh yeah.

Alan has been on vacation for a month, so I feel like I am too. We are all on this restful, ridiculously long, staycation. I get to sleep as late as 8:30 in the morning some days, and going for walks on sidewalks in my own neighborhood is such a breath of fresh air.

But my favorite part is that everywhere I look there are friendly faces, both old friends and new friends too.

playroom photo wall

Moving to encouragement and familiarity, rather than to fresh new beginnings, was exactly what we needed. There’s a time for new adventures, but there’s also a time for returning home. We are lucky. We have many ‘homes.’

The v-tach is back.

This was especially timely as we had other worries. Right before we left Columbus, my heart began acting up again. It felt like a punch in the gut when my cardiology clinic called about my implanted monitor reading, saying that I needed to meet with an electrophysiologist about a possible ablation. (It’s a procedure where they go in through your leg with a catheter and burn off the cells of your heart that are causing the trouble.)

I’ve been trying to avoid having an ablation, but my heart keeps acting up. It’s all unsettling and tiring. What mom needs yet another thing to WORRY about???

Most days I’m fine. I’m not even a big worrier, but it’s there in the back of my mind. I pushed off the electrophysiology appointment. I’m going in July.

That’s why it’s that much sweeter that this move was to a place we hold dear, rather than to a new frontier, if you will. We have health issues to sort through and children to raise. It feels like the perfect time to be back in our beloved Virginia.

Thank you for welcoming us back.

Daniel, anxiously waiting at the door for his friends to arrive.

This summer we are memorizing Psalm 23 as a family. (Yes, even little John David). It felt fitting because it’s a short but mighty message, and God has taken such good care of us.

Psalm 23

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Alan and the boys, National Mall, Washington D.C., summer vacation 2017

Alan and our two boys on the National Mall, Washington D.C., when we first moved there in 2009

We have been officially notified that we’ll be moving back to the D.C. area this summer.

I SHOULD be like WAHOO!!  Let’s do this!! After all, I love D.C., and this is an excellent job opportunity for Alan. Plus, I’m moving close to so many friends. I love D.C. It’s like an entire metropolitan area of people who are ALL just as uptight as I am. These are my people!!!

But in the words of Forrest Gump, “I’m pretty tired. I think I’ll go home now.”

Oh, wait. Where is home??? Ya’ll, I’m just tired of the moving, the packing, the researching, the move-out cleaning, the de-cluttering, the stress, making the kids say good-bye to their friends….That’s the hardest part.

We are quite happy to return to an area that we loved, underneath all our anxiety. In fact, I have so much anxiety over this move, I’ve been unintentionally clenching my jaw as I scroll through hundreds of housing ads. It hurts to eat now.

Y’all!! The decisions are overwhelming, and we’ve lived there before. It feels like we just left D.C., but it’s actually been almost 4 years!

It’s mind-boggling, all these houses and schools and neighborhoods. I have to pick a house that comes with an acceptable elementary as well as middle school nearby now. I’m simply going to HAVE to do a re-con trip to go look at things for myself. We are in the process of planning that out too.

Caleb, age 2, by the fountain in front of the U.S. Capitol building

But wait. Why should I allow this move to make me so crazy?

I need to s-l-o-w down. Take a few deep breaths. Trust Alan. Trust God. Everything will work out just fine. And no, I may not get everything exactly how I want it, but it will all come together.

I taught a Sunday school lesson, to my class of 4th and 5th grade girls, this morning about Paul and Silas. They were arrested in Philippi for casting a demon out of a slave girl. They were beaten and thrown into prison. What did Paul and Silas do? Worry until their jaws hurt? No. They sang. They knew God had their back, and they weren’t worrying themselves silly. (Acts 16)

I guess if Paul and Silas could sing in prison with their feet in the stocks, I can sing through this move. After all, this move is a blessing anyway, a blessing that’s carrying us back to a place that we love.

God’s got this, so we got this too. Breathe. Calm down.

Me with the 2 oldest boys, at the National Archives, 2009

Want to see a few houses I’m looking at?

Just for fun, really because I won’t get up there until March to look around…but these houses are so beautiful.

See if you can guess which two are on a military base. The base is my back-up in case I can’t find a rental.

But y’all, I just don’t know if I can move back and NOT live in my old neighborhood, and none of those are advertising yet. We loved that place and those people so much, but it has to be right for all 6 of us. I’m hoping it will work out!

***All photos were obtained from zillow.com, with the exception of the on-post houses, which were obtained from here.***

Amazing, huh? These will all be gone by the time I’m ready to sign papers though. If any of you know of a rental coming open in my old neighborhood or surrounding area, be sure to let me know!

I’m beginning to calm down and get excited now! It’s time to do less worrying and more singing. Let’s have a little Faith Hill and Shelby Lynne and “Keep Walkin’ On!”

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The post House Hunting Time is Here! appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.

******This is the 12th chapter in the series The Real Army Wives, stories from a young military bride at the beginning of Operation Iraqi Freedom, 2003.******

Previous chapter: When Alan First Deployed: My New Friends at 9-1-1.

Getting Help

I followed through with my vow from the previous night to hop off this crazy train and get myself some help. What kind of help, I had no idea, but I figured I’d try the doctor’s office first.

Military clinics are a unique entity. The appointment line system in and of itself is enough to make a person go absolutely mad, but somehow I managed to secure myself a same day appointment. I must have called at 7:59 am, and God was just smiling down on me that day because it’s normally about impossible to get an appointment.

I remember that every single time I would go to the Fort Hood health clinic they would circle my BMI (too low–which I can’t even imagine now) and take my blood pressure and my heart rate twice, because “that just couldn’t be right.” Ha! Yet it took 13 more years to figure out I needed heart medicine. We always just thought I was nervous, which really I was.

On that particular day of desperation, I saw a female, civilian physician who I’d never seen before. She was probably in her 60s, a thin, upbeat woman with short white hair and glasses. I liked her immediately, which is very unusual for doctors. Don’t you love it when things actually work out?

Telling my shortened tale of woe to this doc, who we’ll call Dr. Jones, was a humiliating thing to have to do, but I knew it had to be done. I told her about my jaw and my inability to sleep before 4am. I even admitted about calling 9-1-1, though I doubt I told her how many times I had done it.

The tears came. I couldn’t help it. This was so embarrassing. What kind of adult can’t even handle living alone? Well, me, I guess.

She asked me if I was depressed, but I didn’t feel like I was in general a depressed sort of person because I’m not, but the situation was definitely getting to me in a bad way.

After listening, Dr. Jones told me a little part of her own story.

Apparently, she went to medical school in Chicago. Her apartment situation was on the wrong side of town. Dr. Jones confided that she had once even accidentally left her keys in her front door!! She said a neighbor knocked on her door, handed her her keys, and reprimanded her kindly, “Girl, this ain’t no nice neighborhood. You can’t be leaving your keys in the door!!!”

So Dr. Jones counseled me that while break-ins do happen, most people are basically good. She reassured me I would be okay.

Then she prescribed to me a 30 day supply of Ambien, a sleeping pill. Dr. Jones said that it would fix both my sleeping problem AND my jaw.

My jaw?? How could a sleeping pill fix TMJ? That was because the jaw was the result of constantly grinding my teeth, which I was doing, unawares, in my sleep.

I’ve never left a doctor appointment so relieved. Maybe I was a touch embarrassed that I needed sleeping pills, but mostly I didn’t care. I just couldn’t wait to get a full night’s sleep and be able to eat potato chips again.

And you know what? It worked!

My jaw stopped hurting within a couple of days, and I stretched that Ambien out to well past 30 days and then never had to take it again.

Sometimes when times get hard enough, we just need a little boost to get us through.

Unfortunately, I was still actually more depressed than I was willing to let on to any doctor.

My life was not working out as I’d planned it at all. My Mr. Right was oceans away, and I could only hope that he would even come back. This was a tough situation to work through. There was no way around that.

[clickToTweet tweet=”Sleeping pills could fix my physical problems, but not my spiritual problems. #milspouse #armywife #faith #Jesuscan” quote=”Sleeping pills could fix my physical problems, but they couldn’t fix my spiritual problems.”]

However, the sleeping pills did provide me with some mental clarity during the day. Y’all! Sleep is so incredibly important. Never underestimate it!

The sleep allowed me to look at my life and examine myself more honestly and realistically.

My whole life I had always been a spiritual person. From the age of 4, I remember looking up at the sky and simply feeling the all-powerful presence of God. I didn’t know anything about Him. My family did not go to church, but I knew He was there. Creation testifies to the Creator.

While I was 4, a neighbor invited me to church. I was so excited to go with her and finally learn who in the world was God!! I can still remember the blue dress that I wore the first time I went, with the white lace at the top and the pretty sleeves. That was the day I first heard about Jesus.

After that, there was no turning back for me. I wanted to know more, and more, and more. My mom started taking my sister, my brother, and me to church herself. It was extremely difficult to take my big sister, Amanda. As I mentioned before, Amanda was blind, mute, profoundly retarded, and handicapped from birth.

While Amanda was mute, she could yell, just not talk. She often yelled out, but not with words, and she rocked back and forth, shaking her wheelchair enough to make it roll whether the brakes were on or not. Plus, it’s a lot harder to carry around an 85 pound person than a 30 pound toddler.

It was almost impossible to take Amanda anywhere. Therefore, after the first few years, Mom began to let Amanda stay home with my dad. It was just Mom, my brother, and me that went to church from then on.

But Amanda was a blessing to us too. From her we had all learned more about love, compassion, sacrifice, work, and serving.

From God’s Word, we found comfort and healing from some of our own hard situations.

By the time I was seven, my Mom went forward and accepted Jesus as her Savior. I got saved soon after her, and my little brother did a few years later.

We firmly believe that Jesus is the Son of God, sent to Earth to reconcile man to God. God loves us, but we are sinful. There’s a price for that sin, but Jesus paid the price for us, and we need only believe with our hearts and confess with our mouth that Jesus is Lord.

Salvation is a gift of grace, not a work that we accomplish. Not one of us is any better than any others of us.

Over the years, starting in middle school, I became a devout student of God’s Word. At that age, it isn’t enough to hear a preacher say something. You have to examine the truth for yourself in order to believe it.

Misplaced Faith

But between high school and college, I somehow seemed to have put too much of my faith in the Bible study that I was doing rather than in what Jesus has already done for us.

You see, after getting married, it was harder to keep up my Bible study routine. Alan was always there, it seemed, and reading my Bible isn’t something I can do if I’m not alone. As the deployment approached, and I needed comfort from the Lord most, I was praying and reading my Bible less and less.

I didn’t mean to. It was just a new routine to work out.

Once Alan deployed, I was stuck in this absurd mindset that I couldn’t reach out to God because I had not been reading my Bible every single day. How ridiculous! Ya’ll! Reading your Bible doesn’t benefit God nearly as much as it benefits YOU. Your Bible reading doesn’t make you more worthy either.  Only Jesus makes us worthy.

Whether I read my Bible or not, God was still there. I could have called out to Him at ANY time, any place, and he would have heard my prayer. But at the time, I was stuck on stupid.

That’s when I realized that I had become puffed up, thinking highly of myself because I read my Bible so much and thinking that was why God answered my prayers.

That year I learned that God doesn’t work that way.

He is not a bank that you deposit prayers and study in and then cash out in hard times. No. God is always here. He’s always available. We need only seek him. We need only have faith. He will always be found by those who seek him.

Suddenly, I was seeing clearly. I don’t think Alan had even been gone much more than a month before I realized how foolish I had been.

I wasn’t just depressed because of my circumstances. The problem was that I was focusing too much on my OWN problems. I was being self-centered, and I was depriving myself of even praying under some foolish notion that I didn’t deserve answered prayers.

God answers our prayers because He loves us, and you know what? He still loved me, and I finally realized that once I got my head all sorted out!

I vividly recall bending down on my knees, at the foot of my bed, with tears all over my face and probably snot too, and realizing all these things as I prayed. This is where life had brought me–to my knees!!

My next steps were suddenly crystal clear. This year wasn’t about “how I was going to get through this” at all. Instead, it was time for me to focus on helping my friends “get through this”. It was time for me to build a support network.

Some of my friends from church: Jessie, Ashley, me, and Theresa. Ashley’s husband was also in the 4th ID. Jen and Theresa’s husbands deployed later that year with the 1st Cav……..By the way, those are none of their real names.

Time to Reach Out to the Other Real Army Wives

I didn’t have much to give or many talents that I could think of to use, but I could cook, and I had a cute little duplex to visit with friends and neighbors in.

So from that day on, my mission was to gather Army wives in my living room and attend any outing I was invited on. We would laugh, we would cry, we would gossip (sorry, but we would) and encourage one another, and none of us would truly be alone anymore.

There was Elsie across the street, who seemed to be doing just fine, but I needed her. I was going to have to start with building that bond. There was Sarah, the bubbly specialist’s (or was he a corporal??) wife I’d met at a unit sports day before Alan left. There was Katie and little Garrett, and Ashley and the gals from church, and so many more that I was yet to meet. But I was ready to get started supporting others and no longer thinking ever so much about myself!

Want to know what happened next? Click here for the next chapter: The Coffee Group

Come back next MONDAY for the next tale in this series of Real Army Wives stories, right here on storiesofourboys.com.

Need to catch up on previous chapters? Click here for last week’s and here for a somewhat complete list.

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