There was this one particular Sunday, about two months ago, that I was sitting with our 6-year-old in church. John David was in rare form that day, just bursting at the seams with thoughts to speak and questions to ask, all during the sermon, of course. I actually sat in the pew and jotted down the hilarious things he said while it was fresh on my mind, for your reading enjoyment:

“Mom, in the past, did they have doctors?”

“Did they have wood?”

“Did they have metal?”

I briefly answered these questions, and then I handed him a stack of post-it notes and a pen.

He made a chain of the post-it notes and fashioned it into a sort of horn. Then he proceeded to make noise out of his created instrument. I quickly took that away, as well as the pen as he was making noise with it too.

John David then made a pair of binoculars out of the post-it notes, looked at me through them and whispered loudly, “How much longer?”

I gave him back the pen, hoping he would finally just draw.

By this point, he had attracted the attention of his oldest brother who began to give him strongly disapproving scowls every few minutes. Little brothers are so embarrassing.

J.D. was undaunted by the opinions of others. He went right back to work and wrote one thing on each sticky note and then stuck 5 or 6 of the notes to his arm rest.

Needless to say, once the service was over, I cleaned up our row of seats and left quite willingly without making eye contact with anyone who was sitting near us that day.

But I have to admit, I was a little amused.

The post Sitting in Church with My 6-year-old Talker appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.

My first one was ridiculously over-zealous:

I’ve scratched some of that mess out and shortened it and replaced as much as possible with “Sit on the porch and watch Daniel ride his trike.”

However, a TRULY REALISTIC schedule would look more like this:

6:00 Begin hitting snooze button….

6:30 Get out of bed. Take quick walk.

6:45 Argue with Alan over which is quicker: Keurig or coffee pot, guzzle coffee, change poopy diaper, run upstairs to try to put make-up on my face.

8am Run out the door for my 8:00 appointment. Haha, nah, I’m not QUITE that bad, but I do typically allow myself 10 minutes for each 20 minute drive that I take.

9am: Arrive home, thank Alan for cleaning up the house and making coffee. Take boys for walk.

9:30: Drill the boys on information they’ll never use after college. Bwahahahaha But if they want to GO to college, this information is useful, I’m telling you!!

10:00 Play math ‘games’ with Caleb, hoping my use of the word ‘games’ will help him stop pretending to fall asleep.

10:30 Referee whoever is arguing. Okay, everyone, let’s go to the library. Off we go. Did everyone pee? Where are your shoes? I’ll go get JD some socks. No, you can’t bring chips. Here’s a book bag for everyone. Put your books in YOUR book bag. My back is struggling here.

11:45 Arrive home with 50 billion books to read, tired because I forgot to take my stroller to the library, and we are SO HUNGRY.  Shove tons of food down my throat because I’m starving, and I forgot to eat breakfast. Feed the children, clean up 100 tiny pieces of cereal that JD accidentally spilled in the floor….3 hours ago….but hey, at least I finally remembered to clean it up.

12:00 Put JD down for a nap. Wait for him to hug everyone 5 times first….

12:15 Sort of clean up lunch dishes.

12:30 Read to children. Do more teacher stuff: handwriting, geography, etc., etc.

1:30 Reading tutor arrives. Chat. Make us more coffee.

1:45 Do pre-school with Daniel, quietly, trying not to interrupt the excellent learning going on in the other room.

2:30 Remember that I never started the crock pot this morning. Also, I’m starving again. Sit on the porch and watch the kids ride bikes while I stuff my face.

3:00 Wonder how many times a week it’s okay to order pizza….Convince a kid to go wake up JD.

3:30 Update my blog.

4:30 Coral the children, get socks and shoes on everyone, and set out for Caleb’s soccer practice. Don’t forget your ball! Let’s take water! Let’s take snacks! Yes, I’m hungry again.

4:50 Set out on foot for Caleb’s practice. Drown in sweat because it’s actually 80 something degrees today. Stupid global warming.

5-6pm Try to keep my little boys happy on the tiniest playground ever.

6:00 Soccer parent meeting

6:30 Finally arrive home and face the fact that I did not cook supper….Feed everyone junk from the freezer.

7:00 Sit on the sofa and wonder why I don’t have more energy.

7:30 Alan and I rally ourselves to DO BEDTIME WITH FOUR KIDS.

4 baths. 4 sets of pajamas. 4 stories. We’re so crazy.

9:00 Go downstairs and stare at dishes in sink. Try to I Dream of Jeannie blink them away. It never works… Stumble through a few chores.

10:00 Head upstairs. To shower or not to shower, that is the question……

Don’t worry. Don’t worry. I just remembered the sweaty soccer practice. I PROMISE that I WILL shower.

Okay, most of that is just what REALLY DID happen today. But it’s only 4:30, so I still have to go do the sweating, the tiny playground, and the facing dinner failure part….

Every parent needs this sign!!!

I’m happy, though. I know I don’t sound like it, but this is fun. I should also mention that I answer some sort of question, sometimes from a child, sometimes from a well-meaning adult, every 5 minutes. I need to make myself a “No questions at this time sign” and wear it around my neck.

Okay, Daniel is here, and I think he just confessed to putting a fruit snack wrapper in the toilet. And with that, I’d better go rally the troops for soccer practice in the scorching sun.

Roll Tide.

The post What a truly realistic schedule would look like appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.

  This past week was a seriously crazy one.

  Monday:

We drove into the city for  Daniel’s “My ears hurt” doc appointment.  It turned out his ears were totally fine.  If only I knew how to check for ear infections!  I could spare myself so many doc appointments!

Then we came home, picked up Joshua from half day school, and stayed home until Monday night Yoga class.

I squeezed in laundry and household chores where I could.

Tuesday:

I took the big boys to school, came home and got Dan ready, and took Dan to his school.  I was late, as always.

I had promised Joshua to take cupcakes to his class at his lunch, in honor of his birthday.  I ran around town buying just the right cupcakes and such for Joshua’s birthday.

Of course, that conflicted with Dan’s pick-up time, so my friend Stacie helped me out with that.  I decided to meet Stacie at the playground after school and hang out with the preschool moms.  By the time I got home, it was time to turn it around and go get my big boys.

Once I got the big boys home, it was time for Joshua’s parent/teacher conference.

Cara came over and babysat the oldest three during the conference.  We got out and drove her home, but I had our pizza for dinner delivered.

Wednesday:

First off, I had John David’s 4 month well baby appointment.  Have you ever had one of those days where you actually amaze yourself??  I’m not trying to brag, but pulling this off felt like a serious accomplishment.  I had prayed that morning, and let me tell you, I know God was there.

The drive to the doc’s office usually takes 25 minutes, but that day it took 40, so there had been some stress before we even arrived.

After waiting about 20 minutes, with Dan coloring nicely and JD sitting on my lap, a lady came over and said they were running behind, but we were second in line.

….About an hour, a bathroom trip, three books, countless coloring pages, and a few new acquaintances later,  John David started to get very restless, and I began to realize I could not put him off on his feeding much longer!

He still refuses a bottle.

He finally started crying.  I so did not want to have to feed my baby in front of my new acquaintances!

By this point, Dan way lying under my chair, driving little cars.  Yes, I know there are germs, but there is a limit, people!!!  I fished out my nursing cover and started feeding the baby…..and of course…..”John!  John!”  They finally called us back.

You should have seen us, gathering all the toys I’d brought, putting everything back in the stroller, and walking through the waiting room……still feeding the baby.  That was a new experience for me.  Not a man there dared to look me in the eye…..Ha!  (Yes, I was still covered.)

That was when I had the moment!  That tired but victorious feeling!  This is absolutely crazy, but by golly, I am doing it anyway.  6 years ago, I might have been on the verge of tears in such a situation, but  I felt perfectly calm.  I actually amazed myself!

Roll Tide.  No really, Praise God!

Thursday:

So back to Thursday….

Friday:

Nonna and Aunt Janet arrived.  Ya’ll should see how tidy my house is right now.  It never looks like this.  I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again.  Grandparents are a gift from God.  And we love our Aunt Janet too!

The post What a week we have had: Toddler mom Stories appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.

What. a. morning.

Before I tell you this, you must first envision me 32 weeks pregnant.  Okay, it looks a little like this:

and that was actually a couple of weeks ago….

So each day is something of a work out anyway, but this morning was……..especially special….

1st the walk to school was a little rough due to constant false labor contractions.  Don’t worry, they don’t really hurt, and once I quit walking they were gone.

It was “walk to school” day, which I had forgotten about since we walk to school everyday, but we came in on the tail end of it and joined the parade of walking school children.  They take a different route than we do, going by a very busy highway.

There was one minor scare/embarrassment when I heard my kindergartener, Caleb, being told to get back on the sidewalk.  I thought he was right beside me, but I turned around to realize he’d been darting around in the grass, by the aforementioned busy highway (don’t worry we never go that way normally), picking dandelions……gotta love a public bad parenting moment like that.

Then I walked all the way back home, pushing 2-year-old Daniel in his stroller and discovered I’d locked myself out of the house.  My cell phone was also nicely locked up.

No lectures, please, Dad.

…….So……first, Dan and I sat in the backyard and cried together.  Dan cried, “Daddy, daddy, daddy.”  But unfortunately, there was no daddy around.

My mind ran through all my options.  Finally I decided the quickest fix, perhaps not the easiest, was to simply break in.  I might have locked the door, but I knew of a window that I had left cracked (the weather was nice this morning).

…..yep.  That was my plan, fit myself through a SMALL window, 8 months pregnant, and this part of the house is slightly elevated.  It’s a first floor window, but it’s a high one, as in over my head.

Daniel and I went into the storage room, and of course, the ladder was in the very back corner of the very full storage room.

And of course, storage rooms freak me out, as you never know what wildlife may be lurking in there!

It took me about 5 minutes to very carefully climb into the window.  There was a lot at stake, so I knew I could not misstep and hurt myself, the baby, and possibly even Daniel.

I actually fit into that window more easily than I expected to, but there was a moment where I was afraid the ladder would fall over, and there I was with one leg in the window and one leg out…  When you’re 8 months pregnant, you don’t climb into a window belly down.  

 You have to go legs first, belly up.

Daniel was cool as a cucumber about that part, watching me climb into the window.  I had explained to him that I’d go around to the side door and let him in too.

You can’t imagine how excited I was when it actually worked!!  I heaved myself through that window, jumped onto the floor, ran to the side door, and there was Dan, waiting for me.

Please no email or phone call lectures about how dangerous I am.  All turned out fine.

Anyway, it may not sound like much, but to Daniel and me it was quite the victory, a serious adrenaline rush, and I won’t soon forget it, let me tell ya!

Finally inside my house, I took care of Daniel’s needs, rested a bit, and headed out the door to my fitness class.

I was dragging a little at my class this morning, but I still put in enough effort to get a good sweat in.

Daniel pooped in his pants during the class, so I took care of that…..

I came home feeling like finally sitting down, so I served lunch to Daniel and me.  Daniel finished quickly and moved on to the dining room table to color.  Lulled into a false sense of security, I leisurely enjoyed my oatmeal.  Now you probably think you know where this is going, but hang with me.

I finished my food, and proceeded to the dining room to take my sweet toddler and lay him down for a nap.  (Then I would be “free at last”).

What I saw instead was Daniel, happily pouring an entire, very full, bottle of syrup all over the dining room table…..

I’ll spare you the details, but an hour and twenty minutes later, and all people here having showered, I am finally sitting down.

The post MisAdventures at 32 Weeks Pregnant …..Embarrassments and Getting Stuck in a Window appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.