When I was a child, I loved Valentine’s Day. No, not really just Valentine’s Day. I loved ALL the holidays. I never liked those questions where people ask you which is your favorite. As a kid people often ask you your favorite things.

“What’s your favorite color?”

“Favorite holiday?”

“Favorite food?”

I have the same problem with all three of these questions, which no one asks you when you’re an adult, until you have children. Then your children ask you these questions. Of course, they add on things like:

“What’s your favorite animal?”

“Favorite dinosaur? Second favorite? Third favorite?”

I must be the most boring person ever, because I never did know how to answer these questions. My favorite book is Anne of Green Gables, and my favorite boy is Alan, so I married him. All the colors are beautiful, food is delicious, all the food, and holidays? I sort of live for holidays these days.

I think things like, “What holiday is next that I need a wreath for?”

“Who is the next person I have to buy a present? Who’s birthday is next?”

“Wait. Are we close to Christmas? What season is it even?”

So do I like Valentine’s Day? Yes, I’ve written about this before. I do not even care if the holiday was created by greeting card companies. The people who complain about this holiday are usually just men who are too cheap to buy flowers and chocolates. It is a day to exchange chocolate, go out to eat, and tell people you love them. What’s not to love?

Well, yes, there’s the whole single person thing, but when I was single I do not remember Valentine’s Day bothering me. I mean my mom still bought me those little boxes of conversations hearts, so really I was happy.

In school, we always decorated our little white bag with construction paper hearts, exchanged store-bought paper Valentines, and ate cupcakes and drank fruit punch. Wahooo! Happy Valentine’s Day to us!!!

We don’t do anything elaborate for this holiday. We exchange pleasantries in the form of Russell Stover’s, and we order take out food because we hate crowds. Some years I cook something everyone likes and make strawberry cake. It’s all very simple and exciting.

I do have a couple of ideas for what I want to do this year. This has been quite a challenging school year, and we need pick-me-ups in the form of holidays on the regular. I made a video earlier today to talk about Valentine’s Day as well as the books I have been reading lately. Of course, it froze on a less-than flattering photo, so mash play, and you won’t have to keep seeing my face looking all rough.

The Date Night Coupon Printable

I mentioned these in the video, but I got cut off. You see, I have this timer that lets me know I have spent too much time on Facebook, and it always kicks on at the most inopportune of times, like in the middle of filming. Click here to print these date night coupons for yourself. I noticed you have to scroll down to the very bottom of the blog post to print the coupons, and you can choose pre-printed ones or ones that say “Date Night” but then you fill in whatever you want the date to be.

I actually got that whole date night idea from the TheMessyBunMommie.com, if you would like to check out her blog.

Basically, my plan is to make this upcoming Valentine’s weekend the best I can make it. Moving has been such a hard transition. I can’t even explain to you how hard uprooting one’s world over and over again is, and we need all the holidays we can get. This year’s will actually be extra special because Daniel and John David are getting baptized this week.

Whatever year I’m in, that year is my favorite, so I’m calling this year my best one, and I am determined it will be. Much love to all of you! Go paint things pink and eat chocolate.

“But love ye your enemies, and do good, and lend, hoping for nothing again; and your reward shall be great, and ye shall be the children of the Highest: for he is kind unto the unthankful and to the evil.”

Jesus in Luke 6:35

I’m linking up with Finish the Sentence Friday. “Favorite or Worst Valentine’s Days”

The post An Easy and Happy Valentine’s Day appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.

A couple of weeks ago I found out that the ladies’ ministry at my church is going to have a cookie contest. It is really more than just a contest, it is a luncheon, but at the luncheon there will be a cookie contest. Then the cookies are delivered to teachers at a local school. We are giving back to our community with something pleasant like Valentine cookies.

Now I am a regular attending member of our church, and also I like to go to ladies’ fellowships. No, I actually straight up NEED to go to them because I have not put forth much effort into getting myself connected here. I need to do more, but I admit I groaned at the cookie part.

Why did I groan at the cookie part?

Well, it is simple. I just do not have a pretty valentine go-to cookie recipe. I do love baking, but making things pretty is a skill I do not possess. It does not come naturally to me, for sure. So I set out on a mission.

Mission: Find cookie recipes, try a few out, and let my family choose one that will not be a total embarrassment to take to the ladies’ fellowship.

I had the best of intentions. Winning is not the goal. That is ridiculous. Simply not embarrassing myself, that’s the goal. I went to Pinterest, and I built the most beautiful of Valentine’s Day cookie boards. You see, pinning things, that I am very good at. In fact, if you would like to see my idea board, just click here. You’ll love it.

Then a week ago, I finally got around to trying out one of the recipes. I tried this one:

That looks delicious, right? They are too, but you wouldn’t believe how much trouble making these was, due to life circumstances, and then in the end, only around 7 of the 24 even got eaten.

Let me tell you what happened.

First, I ground the Oreos and mixed them with the cream cheese, per the instructions. I was ever-so-careful to have all of the ingredients that I needed. Then I flattened them out into a baking pan, all nice and neat and placed them in the freezer to set.

That’s when I realized my heart-shaped cookie cutters were a casualty of this past summer’s move. I searched everywhere: inside, outside, downstairs, upstairs, every single cabinet, every single box, every single drawer. There was no rock unturned, no crevice unchecked, but there were absolutely zero heart cookie cutters. I found Christmas ones and ghost ones, but no hearts. Disappointedly, I moved the pan of chocolate dough from the freezer to the refrigerator.

The next day, I went by the grocery store. I figured I would just buy some cutters there. Valentine’s day is near. Surely they will have them. They did not.

Finally, Alan said, “Just order some on Amazon!” So I did. I ordered these. They were a very good deal. Here is an Amazon ad for them:

They came in the mail two days later, and I ever-so-excitedly cut out my hearts, melted down about 3 bags of chocolate chips, and dipped to my heart’s content. Some of them fell apart, but some didn’t. I actually had a fairly successful looking batch. The kids came home and were pleased.

I took a ton of pictures throughout the process because I expected the whole thing to flop, and then I would write a Nailed it/Failed It Valentine edition, so you could all laugh with me, but then they turned out pretty good.

As for flavor, they were insanely sweet, especially with the white chocolate. The boys and I all agreed they were actually too sweet, so even if what was about to happen had not happened, this would not be the recipe to use for the church cookie competition. (The semi-sweet chocolate did taste much better.) We decided this is more of a candy than a cookie, and also it is a lot of work.

The Problem

No, it was not a chocolate problem, per se. It was more of a health in food services type issue. You see, as the day wore on, it became increasingly apparent that I had a scratchy throat and a runny nose. I was extra careful to wash my hands while working on these. I had no idea what was coming.

The boys came home from school, except for Caleb, as he was home sick. They all tasted the desserts, but we did not have much appetite, and these were so sweet. No one ate many. Then somewhere around six o’clock, I began to figure out that I was getting sick. Meanwhile, John David was whiny, whiny, whiny, about every little thing, which is not like him.

Finally, Alan arrived home and infused some even-keeled sanity to the situation, as only a healthy person surrounded by the flu can do. He took everyone’s temperature. John David had a high, actual fever. Mine was barely there, but I had the chills terribly. We went to bed and didn’t really get up until three days later.

And the hearts? Everyone was afraid to eat the flu-ridden hearts. They were thrown into the trashcan.

All that work, wasted. So much money I spent on Oreos, cookie cutters, cream cheese, and chocolate to melt, for nought. All that time and energy, and for what? For nothing.

As my fever broke a few days ago, and I started to emerge from the flu stupor of last week, I thought about those hearts and it reminded me of life in general. We all have work we pour ourselves into, and we all have good reasons for the work that we do. But in the end, only the eternal work survives. Only some of our work matters to other souls and to God himself. How much of our work will all be for nothing, will simply end up at the bottom of a trash can, rotting at the dump, or burning in a fire?

If anyone builds on this foundation using gold, silver, precious stones, wood, hay, or straw, his workmanship will be evident, because the Day will bring it to light. It will be revealed with fire, and the fire will prove the quality of each man’s work. If what he has built survives, he will receive a reward. If it is burned up, he will suffer loss. He himself will be saved, but only as if through the flames.

1 Corinthians 3: 12-15

I am not saying we shouldn’t do the kind of work that won’t last. Things like cooking and cleaning have their own kind of reward in this present life, but there are also bigger things, more important work that we should be doing.

Eternal Work

Last week, Daniel and John David, our youngest two sons, asked to be baptized. They have always believed in Jesus, and a couple of months ago they prayed asking Jesus to be their Savior. It is just a simple prayer, telling God, “I do believe in Jesus, and I know that I am a sinner, and I want Jesus to forgive me and save me and be the Lord of my life.” Daniel has actually prayed the prayer a few times, as many children do as they figure out their faith.

Getting baptized loomed bigger to them though because they were afraid to go forward and talk to a pastor, who they do not even know, and ask him to baptize them. But they did it, and we are so proud of them.

Teaching our children feels like work that lasts. That is work that survives. influencing the life of a child, there is nothing better than that.

Of course, leading your children is just one example. There are so many kinds of work with eternal significance, work that brings glory to God, leads people to Jesus, and helps people in a lasting way.

I do not have some amazing call to action here. I just have a trash can of beautiful, disease-ridden cookies, serving as a reminder that not all work will survive. Do not neglect or look down on the most important work.

P.S. I still need a good Valentine cookie recipe…

The post The Cookie Fiasco: All That Work for Nothing appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.

Alan and me, the day we got engaged, 2002

Today, as I sat rocking my sweet, snotty little JD to sleep, I was reminded of a part of my love story with Alan that I don’t think about much. It’s a story I don’t recall sharing on my blog, about the boldest thing I’ve ever done for love.

Bold, outspoken, and controversial are not words that I believe apply to me, especially when I was young. When it came to boys, romance, love, and all of those sorts of things, I will tell you that I considered myself a true lady. Alan and I got married when I was 21, and he was turning 23, so I didn’t have to experience the single years for long.

I was a Southern girl.

We did not ‘make moves” or call boys. Sure, we were great flirters, but we also knew how to play hard to get. I followed the rules to the T. If I called a boy, it was because I had information to request or to relay, and even then, I did it with a great deal of uneasiness! My mama had taught me well!

I still, to this day, believe that is largely the way to go. You don’t want to end up with a cowardly guy because you made it too easy for him. You want to marry a man who loves you with such great abandon that he rose above his fears because he knew that you were the one he had to be with. That’s my kind of romance!!  Don’t you think?

I do. But with that said, I admit that there came a time, where I had to take my pride, set it aside, and place my entire hand of cards on the table. After even just my few years of dating, from age 15 to age 20, the ‘game’ had gotten on my nerves enough to realize that playing hard to get was the root of 99% of my dating (or lack thereof) misery.

My junior year of college, I re-met Alan.

I knew of him already. We were acquainted because we ran in the same circles. I knew he was a trustworthy, responsible, Christian guy, but that was about all I knew. I liked his big muscles and the way that he carried himself. He was a man amongst boys.

We proceeded to spend every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday eating lunch together, with a large group, at the school cafeteria. We always sat across from each other, and we got to know each other better and better. We were just friends. I didn’t even realize that I had come to like Alan until November.

NO GAMES

Once I finally figured out that I liked Alan, I decided that this would be one relationship in which I would play no games whatsoever. NO GAMES. Those games had caused me nothing but harm, and I was done with them. Did I rush to Alan and confess my feelings?

Heck, no! You can really freak a guy out like that! Instead, I turned up the attention level. I was careful not to flirt with other boys in front of him. I complimented him. I just enjoyed hanging out with him. I even arranged group outings and invited him along.

That worked well, and he asked me out fairly quickly. We went on our first date on December 11, 2001. The date was successful, and as he dropped me off, he asked for another date. I was flying high on the clouds of love. 🙂

Laugh all you want, but the truth is, I was falling in love with him already. You don’t have to date someone to fall in love with them. I had known of Alan for years, and I had been getting to know him well that whole semester at lunch.

Our first date was on a Tuesday. Wednesday passed, and it was finals week, so everyone’s schedule was thrown off. That meant that we did not run into each other at lunch. By Friday, Alan had STILL not called me, after our date. That’s three days! Did he not plan to take me out that weekend? Had he decided to put the brakes on dating me? Why hadn’t he called!!???

I was a whirl of emotions, and to make it worse, I knew that Friday night, I in fact would see Alan because we had both been invited to the same dinner party. How awkward!! I was going to have to face this man, this fellow that I liked so much, but who had destroyed my week of finals exams by neglecting to give me a follow-up call!!  I wasn’t just sad or disappointed; I was angry!

Friday afternoon, as I sat in my room, venting to my friend Leigh, lo and behold, guess who finally called.

It was Alan. I was relieved that he’d called, but I was still offended. What kind of girl did he think I was? I had a life. I had friends. I was a catch! You don’t call me the day of, and ask me out, after you neglected to call me all week!!!!

Did I say those things? No. Instead, I was sort of vague when he asked me to two different group outings, both of which I had already been invited to by my friends.

It went something like this:

“A lot of people are meeting at Candace’s and getting together to go to this movie. I thought I’d see if you wanted to go.”

“Yeah..Oh yeah, that. I was sort of already planning to go to that.”

“Oh. Okay. I’m going to Wes’s for dinner too, are you going?”

“Yeah.”

I don’t remember what else was said, and we hung up fairly quickly.

Leigh and I headed to the dinner party at Wes and Elizabeth’s, and Alan was there.

“So what are y’all doing after this?” Alan asked.

“Going to the movies, I guess. Aren’t you?”

“Yeah, maybe, I don’t know.”

What!? Was he backing out? What in the world was going on? I didn’t have too much fun at dinner that night, thanks to my little romantic drama.

I went home in a fury of emotions.

How had this perfectly timed romance exploded in my face? What in the world was going on? Was he trying to play games with me because I was DONE with that. Leigh and Chrisynda got an EARful that night.

But as I arrived back to my room, I decided that by venting my frustrations to my friends rather than to Alan himself, that I was doing us a great disservice. This wasn’t about my relationship with my friends. This was just about two people: Alan and me.

Forget the Southern creed. I was CALLING him.

But first, let me call Leigh, and see if she thinks it’s a good idea…….okay….Leigh seemed to approve…..soooooo….it went something like this:

“Hey, April?”

Yes, even back then, we had caller ID.

“Hey. Look. We need to talk. I don’t understand what’s going on with you this week. I’m not trying to be weird or pushy or anything, but I’m just confused. You invited me to go out with your friends, but then you said you weren’t sure if you were even going. You didn’t call me all week. Do you like me or not?”

LOL Yes. Yes, I did this. No, I do not regret it.

“Huh? Oh! Yeah!!  I like you a lot, April! I like you a lot! That’s why I wanted to take you out tonight, but it didn’t seem like you wanted to go, and I’m sorry.”

“Okay, well, that’s good. I promise I’m not usually this direct, but I’m just not interested in playing any games. I don’t want to fool with that. I thought we had a really great date on Tuesday, but then you didn’t call me all week, and I was really disappointed, but I figured you must not be interested.  Then you called me this afternoon, and I was glad you did, but I don’t really like being asked out last-minute.”

Ha! Yes. I maintain that a lady should have standards, and her calendar should be respected. 😉

Alan explained that he was terribly sorry about that. He’d figured he’d see me at Burke, but then he just never did. Plus, his pals Jarrett and Will had advised him not to call right away.

Thank you, Jarrett and Will.

You know, it’s kind of funny. Maybe Alan’s buddies were a little bit right. Would I have gotten so invested in this if my pride hadn’t been threatened? Would I have liked Alan as much if he had called me on Wednesday or Thursday? I had ditched clingy boys before, so who is to say? Maybe they were right!

Maybe his strategy worked, but I think he pushed it one day too far. He should have called on Thursday!

So there you have it. Alan proposed that March, and we were married in August. We have now been married for 12 1/2 years. I wouldn’t trade a minute of it.

What’s the boldest thing you ever did for love?

**********

Alan did extremely well for me this year. I was delighted to discover, while out walking in my neighborhood, that calla lilies grow naturally here. There are calla lilies all over the place! Alan took a mental note of my excitement over this and planted several calla lilies in our front yard yesterday afternoon! Love it!

You win the award, Honey. It feels like a hug every time I walk out my front door.

That’s not all, though. This year I have five Valentines. The one I got the most cards from was Caleb. Caleb made me SIX Valentine cards. He totally ‘gets me’ too, because one of my cards, which he stuck to my bedroom door, said this:

“To Mom and Dad, from Caleb

I love you. I hope you get lots of  good rest.”

What a darling! You can see why I rushed to the grocery store last night, to buy these boys more Valentine candy!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

The post The Boldest Thing I Ever Did for Love appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.

My goal for February is to focus more on the positive things that I love about my children. There are SO many, and as parents, I firmly believe we should be praising them way more than we are correcting them. Why does that sometimes seem hard? It’s all in how we think, isn’t it?

I do not want my children to remember me as the mom that fussed at them all the time!

Kids thrive on positive feedback. I know that anything I praise, I will see a lot more of.

My friend Jenifer hosts a #MommyReality Link-up each week on her blog, JJenerallyInformed.com. This week’s theme was “what I love.” The more I thought about that, the more I thought about what I love about each individual child. Thanks for the inspiration, Jen!

love

John David:

I love the way he hugs. Great big bear hugs!

I love the way he sticks out his tongue and raises his arms for us to pick him up.

I love his intelligence. Today a kind nursery worker remarked, “John David is so clever. You know, I’m an educator, and I’ve worked with lots of different kinds of kids. John David really thinks about things. There were two boys that wanted to play with the same cars he did, so John David took the a ball and threw it for them. They ran off and chased it. He seized the opportunity to grab alllllll the cars for himself. I was like, ‘Wow’! Then he did other things too, that I cannot remember. That is a sharp, very aware little boy.”

Of course, we just love hearing things like this!  Hopefully, sharing will come soon…

Daniel:

Adorableness

-I love how much he loves to cook. He’s getting so good at it! This boy knows more about baking and cooking than most 18-year-olds, I promise you.

-I love his happy spirit.

-I love how he likes to help.

-I love how he adores his big brothers.

-I love how easily he makes new friends.

-He just started going to Cubbies on Wednesday night. It’s very easy to finish the Cubby verses, because you just say them back to the leader. His leader told me, “We enjoy Daniel. He’s really good at saying the verses back to us. He says ‘dinner’ instead of ‘sinner’, and we thought it was so funny!”

Caleb:

-I love how tough Caleb is.

-I love how innocent and immature Caleb is, for a 7-year-old that looks like a 10 year-old!

-I love how he is always building something: Lego creations, forts, comic strips, robots made from things he found in my kitchen. It can be messy, but it is wonderful.

-I love how Caleb always sticks up for whoever he feels is the underdog.

-I love his love for science.

-Caleb started Sparks last night, after never wanting to go. He came home so excited. “I made new friends!”

-I love the way he prays so faithfully.

-I love the way he will quickly jump up and accomplish any task that you give him to do.

Joshua:

There was never a more devoted brother.

-I love the way Joshua handles his role in our family. There was never a more devoted older brother. “Mom! Can I get JD up?”

“Can I fix everyone’s breakfast?”

Can I kiss you all over your face, my child?????  (only if I’m quick and sneaky)

-I love the way he always includes everyone. He can have three neighborhood boys over, and Joshua will still come inside and say, “Daniel, aren’t you coming? We saved you a gun!”

-I love the way you can usually get the true story from Joshua. “What really happened…..Joshua? No one else talk!”

-I love the way he reads and reads and writes and writes. I passed on a few bad traits, so it’s really good to know I passed along a few useful ones too!

-I love how quiet he is in the car. 🙂 I like to be quiet in the car too. In our family of six, Joshua and I are the only ones that don’t need to talk in the car.

-I love the way he tries to keep the peace among his brothers.

-I love his leadership skills.

These sweet children make for one seriously happy mom and dad!

Blessed, and trying hard not to forget it!

It’s so easy to lose sight of blessings, in the midst of work, work, work, and clean up, clean up, clean up. We really are blessed. Let’s not forget it!

The post Focusing on the Positive of Each Child appeared first on Stories of Our Boys.